HMMM
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| Stephen Glass in 1998 |
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| Steph Willen in 2016 - |
I spent two years, working on a popular reality show. I made my way up from a lowly Production Assistant to an Associate Producer, but I quit the day Deb from clearance started decorating the office window with Halloween decals a month in advance. It wasn’t the fact she was covering up our only natural light source with pumpkins that felt so suffocating, it was the sudden realization that there was no light at this job for me. I didn’t want to become a producer.
Let us flash back to 10 columns before:
https://www.mcsweeneys.net/articles/column-9-the-balloon-bottom-epoch
Five years earlier, I was working on a popular reality show. Before the holiday break, the executive producer pulled me into his office and said to call him in January because he was moving to another show and wanted to bring me with him and make me a producer. I bragged about it to family and friends. I think I even bought a blazer. When I was back in Los Angeles, I called him but the line got all fuzzy when he answered.
“Hello? Hello?” He’d said. “HELL-O-O-O? Who is this?”
I told him it was me several times then hung up, and feeling nervous and embarrassed, waited a week before I rang him again. I called him from a laundromat because it seemed less scary to crowd the phone call with the sounds of strangers instead of the silence of my apartment and hope.
“Hi Todd, it’s me…”
“Hello? Who? I can’t hear you. Hello?”
The line crackled and got fuzzy, so I hung up and never called him again. I convinced myself he had changed his mind about me. But quite possibly the only reason I’m not a reality TV producer right now is because of bad phone reception. I think I’d hate being a reality producer, though. I’d rather have the freedom to document people’s lives as I see them instead of getting network notes to cut and paste their thoughts, splice their boring humanity with B roll footage of them doing something dramatic.
Big Lie 2. - How she got into acting or why she moved to L.A etc
A.
While attending the University of Colorado, she obtained a more demanding role when her roommate asked her to be the lead in her senior thesis short film.
her film was seen by a talent manager in Los Angeles who encouraged her to pursue acting.Stef moved to Denver and studied acting with Brian McCulley. Shortly thereafter, she was signed by an agent and moved to Los Angeles in 2003. There, she studied acting with Nina Kether Axelrod and improv at the Groundlings and ACME Comedy Theatre.
https://www.mcsweeneys.net/articles/column-19-im-here
So I didn’t really decide anything for myself. Someone said I should take an acting class. I did. I got signed by an agent in L.A. and she said I should move there. And I did.
CAfter taking one acting class in college, she moved to Los Angeles to be an actress
From Simon and Schuster's publishers description(found this on "bookfilter" and can be found on Amazon site)
D. Her dreams of a Nobel prize-winning career in paleoanthropology had been derailed in college by emotional turmoil and addiction,
and after taking just one post-grad acting class,
she made the grossly naïve decision to conquer Hollywood.
In other words, time passed and lies lies lies are gonna get ya, so one college class turned to discovered by manager whose encouragement sent willen to Denver to get training . then all that is forgotten by our least favorite fabricator and now it's a post grad class and nothing more sending this impulsive starlet straight to Hollywood cuz "gross naivete.sorry Mr. and Mrs Willen for all that costly education. Your phi beta kappa is so grossly naive see. . And how did she get so far in school with that memory - she forgot about the thesis film, her original stated major,the agent, the move to Denver the extensive training the Amy Alkon Job. How she really came to L.A to stalk her obsession "Tig" Notaro. Willen did not write the publisher's description -we have to presume- so this poor person is another victim of her "sociopaths vortex"
Willen's Education according to bio for movie EM(link above)
A.
In 2001, Stef graduated magna cum laude with a B.A. in anthropology and biology.
VS.
At the very least, the doors my little golden Phi Beta Kappa key were going to open weren’t supposed to be X’ed with yellow caution tape and kicked in with my own foot.
A few lines in SAME PAGE: I thought: You have to be kidding me. I graduated Magna Cum Laude; I was the star of several student films.
Note to self: figure out for sure if Cum Laudes are ever given such Phi Beta Kappa keys.
B. no mention of any college degree. Just that she moved to L.A after one acting class in college.
Vs.
What the Publisher (Simon and Schuster) put out to sell this non fiction book
Her dreams of a Nobel prize-winning career in paleoanthropology had been derailed in college by emotional turmoil and addiction, and after taking just one post-grad acting class, she made the grossly naïve decision to conquer Hollywood.
Nothing about a degree or a magna cumlaude in Anthropology and Biology.
On author page -
ABOUT THE AUTHOR
Credit TK
STEF WILLEN
Stef Willen is a contributor to McSweeney’s and This American Life and was the co-star of the film, EM, which won the Grand Jury Prize at Seattle International Film Festival. She was raised in Boulder, Colorado and lives mostly in Los Angeles and a little in Santa Fe, New Mexico.
Note: No mention of L.A Press Award or any jobs or education. Why mention a minor film's award. Wouldn't an L.A Press award be a huge selling point in this case?
And during the time that Stef Willen was doing everything she could to destroy the lives of my sister, me and my mother,l Ira Glass had the newest Stephen Glass on his show - In the history of busted literary bullshitters Willen is most like Stephen Glass - great imagination. High IQ. talented writer. And fucked up and Immoral to the core.
Remember big lie number 1, and all that production job talk. Well, it's way past overkill but if you don't mind, please read below to what show and oddly he is coaching her. Reminds me for how Judge Gerald Rosenberg coached "Tig" and friends in the fraud of the hearing that began the whole disaster.
Act Four. Underling Gets An Underling.
Ira Glass
Act 4, Underling Gets An Underling. This is the story of somebody in a job that sounds like the kind of thing that would be, sort of, exciting. Stef Willen worked on a bunch of reality TV shows, but she was a production assistant, a PA, which is the lowest rung on the ladder. She did a lot of emptying trash cans.
Stef Willen
I remember running around town with the weirdest lists of stuff to get, like toilet paper with a specific pattern on it. I've had one boss, she would do things like ask me to hang curtains in her office. And I was like, "Oh, but your wall is made of concrete." And she was like, "Oh, you can do it." You know? Stuff like that. I would be given these bizarre tasks, and if you didn't do them right, there was always this sense of are you stupid?
Ira Glass
And so the way understand it is that towards the end you came up with a plan. Can I ask you to just describe the plan that you came up with?
Stef Willen
I just thought it would be hilarious if I came in the next day with an eager young person who was my production assistant.
Ira Glass
Oh. So you would be a PA and you would have your own PA.
Stef Willen
Exactly. Which is really unnecessary. It's a gopher with a gopher, so I don't know. I wanted to make a point. It'd just be like a little sweet revenge, you know?
Ira Glass
Right.
Stef Willen
I don't know.
Ira Glass
No. No. I understand. You'd be upsetting the natural order.
Stef Willen
Right. Totally. It's like, if you can get someone under you, it's simple math, but you are not at the bottom. I just knew that I was somehow taking control over what was happening in my life if I could put someone just right under me.
Ira Glass
So, OK. So you're a PA hiring a PA. How'd you go about it?
Stef Willen
I wrote up a Craigslist seeking a production assistant on a popular reality TV show. For the ability, I said must possess a medium work ethic, the ability to take out trash, and then sit for hours and work for free. And 21 people responded. 21 people. I was amazed.
I ended up going with this guy, I'll call him Adam. It was interesting, I hired him because I actually felt like he might be slightly delinquent. When we had our, quote, unquote, "interview," he never turned down his car radio. And it was that kind of thing. And I'm like, OK. Well, we're going to meet at the coffee shop and we're going to drive to set. "OK." I'm like, "Do you want to get out a pen and a paper and write this down?" "Oh, OK."
Ira Glass
Oh, wow. So he's really a real beginner. Like, he really was not necessarily ready for the responsibility of a--
Stef Willen
Of a phone conversation.
Ira Glass
Yeah. Or a job.
Stef Willen
Yeah. I met him at a coffee shop. And he was this nice looking young guy. And he was wearing this argyle sweater and this scarf and a beret. And I was like, "Oh, my gosh. What did I just do?"
Ira Glass
A beret?
Stef Willen
A beret. Yeah. He followed me in his car to set, and I was getting a little nervous because I actually hadn't planned anything past this point. The first person we see is the line producer, and she was frantic, as always. You know, "Come on. Come on. We've got a big day. We've got to get going." And I said, "Oh, well you'll be glad to know I have some help. This is Adam, and he is my production assistant for today." And she just sort of stopped and looked at me. And she goes, "Well, good. We need the extra help." And there was no Stef is a genius. Or, oh look what Steff did. It was, literally, like oh, thank you. Oh, we need the help. How did you get him to work for free?
Ira Glass
And so you did introduce him to your bosses?
Stef Willen
Yeah. I introduced him to everybody. I mean, I don't know why I thought that they would learn something from it, but I totally underestimated I guess, the joke, but also their need for workers. They were in production mode. They're not stopping to look at what I'm trying to say. They're like, OK. Well, we're 10 minutes behind. We can use Adam over here in hair and makeup.
Ira Glass
So you were hoping that they would get the lesson of, you see, this whole system you have is so arbitrary? And, we're not just cogs in a machine. Like, I could be a boss. And the lesson they took was not only are you all cogs in a machine, but you're such a cog, we can't even see that you're talking. Like you're not even an animal making noise here. Like, OK. Now, hand me that other animal over there.
Stef Willen
Yeah. Exactly. It's like, oh, two cogs for one. Awesome. We'll take this one, you know? I went from his boss to his sidekick to, I don't know, his buddy? I'd be like, oh, I got this trash can. So it would be really gross and disgusting, and I'm like, oh, I don't want to mess up his scarf. I made sure he ate first. Like, he got his lunch before me.
At one point, we were all sitting around the table. We'd been sitting staring at each other for about two hours, because they were filming, with nothing to do. And I looked over at Adam, and he had taken his beret off and it was on his knee. And he was, sort of, slouched down, and he was moving M&M's across his plate, one by one, with his index finger. And I think he said, "I have never not done anything for this long a time." And I was like, "Well, you know, it did say in my ad the ability to sit for hours." And he laughed.
But shortly after, I told him to go. I was like, "Well, you know, you did a great job today. Definitely send me your resume." He kept in touch, like, he would email, do you know so-and-so? Or just little questions, you know? And then, at one point, he stopped asking me questions. And I got this text from him at 8:26 AM, and it said, "I want you." Period. "I want your body." Period. "Right now." Period. And I was like, OK.
Ira Glass
What did that say to you?
Stef Willen
That he had not taken me seriously at all.
Ira Glass
So you got him into your life because nobody else took you seriously, and then even he doesn't take you seriously.
Stef Willen
Right. It just, sort of, made me laugh. I thought, OK. Well, he wants my body right now, which, 8:26 AM, that wasn't a good time for me.
Ira Glass
Stef Willen, she has quit her PA jobs. She starred in the independent film, M, which won last year's Seattle International Film Festival, and she's writing a book.
NUMBER 1. There was no Adam and no beret! OMG
it's now many reality shows she is claiming. when I knew her she never told me about one show and we talked about reality shows so that's a very bizarre omission. Also, none of this reads as remotely realistic or true.in general. Not just cause it has the ring of untruth, but because if you knew Willen she just is no fun prankster. She would never do what she is telling Ira Glass.
So much in that Mcsweeney's column also rings so false. I could show that in spades, but I just hope there is no longer need to.
This part in that piece does however ring true to the kind of sick puppy that I saw in action.
Ira Glass
No. No. I understand. You'd be upsetting the natural order
Willen: Right. Totally. It's like, if you can get someone under you, it's simple math, but you are not at the bottom. I just knew that I was somehow taking control over what was happening in my life if I could put someone just right under me.
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