Sunday, May 18, 2008

I just saw that this site is promoting a "bank opening jobs" blog and not mine. This filled me with longing and loathing. I mean, why is a bank opening jobs blog more successful that mine? I fear its my template. Or maybe it is that I am too ensnarled in my muffin business to promote it properly. One never knows how much marketing it will take to reach the ass of the mass.

The muffin business is turning into a cesspool of backstabbing and petty nuisances. Why can't we all just co-exist? i don't even expect anyone to get along anymore as per Rodney King, but just .... can't .... we.... co-exist? Libby and Abby are the instigators and I might have to break my no murder in may rule if they don't put a sock in it. She accused me of backstabbing her when i accused her of backstabbing molly and I roared inside thinking how I will stab her in the back and how she will respond to such an unusual evolution from the figurative to the literal.
Dramas seem to crop up and die off on a regular basis and you dear blog are a haven. The price of sugar and other muffin essentials has really gone up and the other ladies all bellyache about it when they're not too busy bemoaning their fibromyalgia or the price of gas. They are all worth in the millions so it is particulary offensive. They all seem to have no issue with Obama's flagrant inexperience and I will tell you why? Because, when you have millions of dollars it is fun to show yourself to be a non racist. There is not anticipated punishment, only reward. College students are voting(or say they'll abandon the kegger to vote) on the same principles. I'm a good guy or gal and I read one issue of time magazine in the waiting room of the college clinic, and he seems like a cool guy. I was in college and my vote would have been worse than useless, and I was one of the more alert and insightful ones. Most of my fellow undergrads were barely non moron. I went to a state school before I went to a seven sister so I shouldn't generalize.

I had so much to tell you in the last few days but I just couldn't get here for a long enough chunk of time to let loose, as they say. I've been contemplating quite a bit and religion tends to enter my mind lately.
Not sure why, really, but it does. I suddenly want to read the new and old testaments, the talmud, mishnah, gemarrah, kabballa, the gospels-- all of it. Then, I'll read the Koran and then I'll find out the differences between Protestanism and Catholothism and Episopalianism etc etc. Unlike the spinster sisters I don't have to worry about money but I do have to keep up a show of normalcy and that consumes much of my time. If I starting taking out all these bibles from the library it would look weird and looking wierd is not advised.

I was raised Jewish, but I want to read the new testament, and see what they are on about. the vengeful god, that I''m familiar with, is not helping so I'm curious about Jesus.

It seems odd to me that they're having been any legitimized prophets as of late. And when I say, "as of late." I mean, thousands of years. You'd think one real one would come along in all this time. I think I started thinking about this when I heard someone say on CNN that Rev. Wright is a prophet. of course, there was a pundit available to debate this. I wonder if CNN and Fox houses their pundits in their studios. They seem to always be there, freshly dressed, and ready to rumble. Back to prophets: The last self professed prophet that comes to mind is the guy who kidnapped Elizabeth Smart and there is no need, here, to discuss the merit of those claims. Jim Jones and the Halle Bop guy are not seen as prophets and niether is anyone else. Those who have claimed prophethood and who have even managed to get some followers always turn out to have some sexually motivated reason for wanting to be a prophet. No female prophet wannabes come to mind. I think it's because we demand that our prophets wear a beard. I know little about Christianity and if my busy overscheduling issue is not resolved soon I never will. I learned through osmosis that Christ was a good guy and that his teaching should impart good things. The world, though, is comprised of many many christians and it is a sewer, so I don't buy that. I find the Jewish belief that the Messiah has not yet come to be much more in tune with my "this world is a mess." sense. I would hope that the appearance of the messiah would not result in such same old same old.

This makes me think of how a new bible could be written just tracing the steps of Oprah and where she has led us.
I can envision the scriptures that would result:

"Molestedtheth, she shared her tale to house wifeths and they tooeth remembered, and memoirs resulteth. Book clubeths sprouted throughout the landeth, and then she did not rest,"

" a jury consulteth was come uponeth and like the rock, water sprang forth. Golden water. Robin sitteth and witnesseth and so shall you. Addiction is a horse and horses are thirstyeth said the water and it was free, the water and now me."


"In the year of the rabbit and the troll, cooking becameth too time consumingeth and toilsome. It looked as if time consuming meals would consume much time . Oprahaeth, called upon an unknown food networketh doofus who claimed to prepare mealeths in shorter times. Rachel Ray climbed down and up the mountain and so it shall be."

I'm sure you get the point. I could and probably will go on and on when I get back from doing my core excercises and paying all my assistants.

tater
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