This is a tenth of the first chapter.

I find it so comical to imagine what Kris Mohandie is telling the TMU clowns -- There just is something deeply funny about a profiler type being faced with an innocent person and trying to "link" the unlinkable. It's going to be a novel I promise you.


Tentative outline:

A unit that is funded(either directly or indirectly) by some celebrity fear of stalker hype that they are responsible for and that is big money in all kinds of ways. And, then this seedy unscrupolous law firm that represents the Governor/Movie Star of California one fated day says to a cowish of counsel to this firm:"Sure, Allison, we'll take care of it. Your client is not even Z list- she's just not on any list-- but we know you'll get us a juicy A lister one ASAP and Gavin Debecker will get good feedback from Marty and we'll retire real early.And I'm sure she wouldn't just lie about it so you just tell Marty we are on IT."

Off they go to Venice on the city's dime and there they see someone that their heterosexual(I assume) heads can't even remotely imagine anyone would want to stalk much less talk to . But, hey Lesbos are different they tell themselves.

Off they go in thier best suits and cruisers to the none too impressive apartment building of the supposed stalker of this unattractive comedian who somehow got herself Lavely and Singer...

There they in all likelihood see and hear things that would make a potato have complete doubt as to the truth of the accusations by this coarse manly stupid seeming Notaro but they are not potatoes they are men with dreams and ambitions and the residents of the apartment in question are surely not rich and surely not well connected and hey.... they're not killing this sweet little family or even jailing them

Well, Gregozek in all probability doesn't lose a second to rationalizing his very very bad behavior but Hoffman just might.

And, so Hoffman does a few justification gymnastics to get him through the days until Gavin Debecker becomes his yummy boss. Damn, he may think... I wish the mother wasn't so damn adorable. But Kielbasa face may say, "Jimmy, it's them or us and we deserve great wealth. I know I know I was shot in the line of duty but you had to go to all those bullshit threat conferences and talk to all those losers who think that Nick Lachey is the second coming...

. You deserve it, man. fuck em. They'll three poor and UNREPRESENTED women-- there is nothing to worry about. Sure, Notaro is repulsive but she can't be all bad if she got Marty's firm on her side. Why should we keep tracking down nutbags obsessed with idiot celebrities for the rest of our stinking lives. REMEMBER BARDO, JIMBO. Remember that-- if nothing else. So what that Tig is more the Bardo here and Tig's "stalker" is more rebbeca sheafer. Shut that pussy conscience of yours down NOW! You know you loved it when LOS ANGELES MAGAZINE Interviewed you. You can smell your the giddiness on the page.
Just look at the beady eyes stuck in my keilbasa face casing and see that I am soooo right.


To be continued...