Sunday, December 13, 2015

Why Scott Boxenbaum, Nick Kroll, Stef Willen, Jazz Ponce,and Cancerous clown, Tig Notaro, deserve to be the next Harris Wittels






July 31, 2008, 3:50 PM 
  #1 
Garage Comedy 

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Shenk Flo tonight Adam's Birthday! 9pm All Star Lanes (not that far) 


Special show tonight inside the Banquet Room Adam's BIRTHDAY SHOW! AUG 20TH IS MY ! CAKE! PIZZA! AND GOOD OLD TIMES FOR ALL THE KID'S LEFT IN THE WORLD like Adam.
Will Maier
Ronnie Prouty
scott krinsky 
Joe Wagner 
Val Myers 
and 2 other shenkman's will be doing a birthday piece.
host- Adam Shenkman
All Star Lanes 4459 Eagle Rock Blvd Los Angeles 90041
9p. Free. Full bar. Cheap drinks. Free Parking. Not as far away as you would think.
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Last edited by Garage Comedy; August 21, 2008 at 5:24 PM. Reason: i just love to edit 



The blonde woman with the cigarette is CUH-RAZY. She stalks comics.
  


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September 27, 2008, 12:17 PM 
  #5 
lisad 
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Re: Shenk Flo tonight Adam's Birthday! 9pm All Star Lanes (not that far) 

Quote:
Originally Posted by scottbox 
The blonde woman with the cigarette is CUH-RAZY. She stalks comics.

I think I'm being stalked too. Who else is she stalking? I'm a fan of your work, scott!
  


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September 27, 2008, 12:42 PM 
  #6 
zgal 
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Re: Shenk Flo tonight Adam's Birthday! 9pm All Star Lanes (not that far) 

Quote:
Originally Posted by scottbox 
The blonde woman with the cigarette is CUH-RAZY. She stalks comics.
who is she stalking? I'm jealous.
  


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September 27, 2008, 3:39 PM 
  #7 
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Re: Shenk Flo tonight Adam's Birthday! 9pm All Star Lanes (not that far) 

No it is serious she really has stalked and harrassed several well known comics. If you run a show I would suggest you be on the look out for her, she is already banned from several places.
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September 27, 2008, 6:31 PM 
  #8 
lisad 
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Re: Shenk Flo tonight Adam's Birthday! 9pm All Star Lanes (not that far) 

Quote:
Originally Posted by helloitslate 
No it is serious she really has stalked and harrassed several well known comics. If you run a show I would suggest you be on the look out for her, she is already banned from several places.
That's awful. She just stalks comics? Who is she stalking?
  


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September 27, 2008, 9:16 PM 
  #9 
zgal 
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Re: Shenk Flo tonight Adam's Birthday! 9pm All Star Lanes (not that far) 

Yeah, scottbox-- who is she stalking??? I had a girlfriend who was stalked and it's really scary. I heard a rumor about this but I'm not sure it's about the same people. Details, please. Is she stalking girls or guys?z
  


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September 27, 2008, 9:37 PM 
  #10 
martha 
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Re: Shenk Flo tonight Adam's Birthday! 9pm All Star Lanes (not that far) 

Quote:
Originally Posted by helloitslate 
No it is serious she really has stalked and harrassed several well known comics. If you run a show I would suggest you be on the look out for her, she is already banned from several places.
I'm running a show at cat and fiddle next month. I'd be interested to know who this person is and who she's stalking and harrassing. You kind of scared me about this person who stalks comics. I think it only right you tell us more detail.
  


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September 28, 2008, 1:27 AM 
  #11 
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Re: Shenk Flo tonight Adam's Birthday! 9pm All Star Lanes (not that far) 

Thanks, lisad. I know for a fact that she's stalked a certain notable female comic (whose name I'd rather not mention) showing up at said comedian's shows and harassing her a little bit. Apparently, it doesn't go further than that. Occasionally, she gets a little hostile and inappropriate towards other females at Garage Comedy. Overall, she's harmless. And I doubt she'll show up at your show, Martha. But if she does, keep an eye on her.
  


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September 28, 2008, 8:48 AM 
  #12 
erinf 
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Re: Shenk Flo tonight Adam's Birthday! 9pm All Star Lanes (not that far) 

Quote:
Originally Posted by scottbox 
Thanks, lisad. I know for a fact that she's stalked a certain notable female comic (whose name I'd rather not mention) showing up at said comedian's shows and harassing her a little bit. Apparently, it doesn't go further than that. Occasionally, she gets a little hostile and inappropriate towards other females at Garage Comedy. Overall, she's harmless. And I doubt she'll show up at your show, Martha. But if she does, keep an eye on her.


Scott, you've scared me. Just tell us female comics the name of who she's stalked and where she's been banned so we can feel safe. You can private message me if you feel that's better. Your post and hello post have made me concerned. Helloits's late seems to make it seem real serious. Please clear it up asap!
  


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September 28, 2008, 9:25 AM 
  #13 
lisad 
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Re: Shenk Flo tonight Adam's Birthday! 9pm All Star Lanes (not that far) 

Your very welcome, scott. I'll introduce myself to you next time. I'm hot. LOL.You should say the comics name so we all could look out for her. Stalking is not harmless so I'm confused now. If she's banned from several places then she must be very dangerous. I've just moved here and I'm not up on what's goin on so please tell me more so I can be careful. I feel left out
lol.

Last edited by lisad; September 28, 2008 at 11:20 AM. 
  


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September 28, 2008, 3:14 PM 
  #14 
erinf 
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Re: Shenk Flo tonight Adam's Birthday! 9pm All Star Lanes (not that far) 

scottbox, can you give more detail about this crazy? Private is fine or whatever. 

peace,
erin
  


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September 28, 2008, 5:25 PM 
  #15 
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Re: Shenk Flo tonight Adam's Birthday! 9pm All Star Lanes (not that far) 

Guys, this woman is pretty weak and harmless at the core- someone with horrible self-esteem who's completely unable to read social cues. If she bugs one of you, be straight up and tell her you're not interested, and to please leave you alone. If she persists, tell her go 'f' herself. If she yells at you, turn around and walk away. You won't hear from her again.

Shunning is a powerful tool. Trust me- it was done to me in high school.
  


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September 28, 2008, 7:38 PM 
  #16 
zgal 
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Re: Shenk Flo tonight Adam's Birthday! 9pm All Star Lanes (not that far) 

Wow. I finally got around to watching the video and I know her. I've seen her do lots of open mikes and quite a few booked shows in L.A . She was at abbots habit doing an open mic last monday and she was awesome-- the best of the night.
She was known as a comic's comic in Austin. She was completely original,charming, and hilarious. She ran a show in austin and I was visiting a buddy, and saw it. She's one of the best comedians I've seen actually. A few friends of mine had huge crushes on her when she was in New York.
She's really brilliant and attractive and I'm really offended by this. I think scott got rejected by her or something and is getting revenge. Shame on you, scott. Disgusting.
  


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September 28, 2008, 7:46 PM 
  #17 
zgal 
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Re: Shenk Flo tonight Adam's Birthday! 9pm All Star Lanes (not that far) 

Quote:
Originally Posted by scottbox 
Guys, this woman is pretty weak and harmless at the core- someone with horrible self-esteem who's completely unable to read social cues. If she bugs one of you, be straight up and tell her you're not interested, and to please leave you alone. If she persists, tell her go 'f' herself. If she yells at you, turn around and walk away. You won't hear from her again.

Shunning is a powerful tool. Trust me- it was done to me in high school.
You're one sick dude.
  


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September 28, 2008, 10:12 PM 
  #18 
lisad 
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Re: Shenk Flo tonight Adam's Birthday! 9pm All Star Lanes (not that far) 

I have to say that scottbox seems to have a personal problem with this woman and is pretending that she is some stalker for his own purposes. Zgal says he's seen her perform and she's good and scottbox says that she's a dangerous stalker who never went on stage, and then that she's harmless. Very fishy. I'm kind of grossed out by such slander and libel of someone he is pretending isn't a woman who rejected him. I hope this is not how comedy works in L.A. The way scottbox is talking about shunning is creeeeeeeeeeeeepy. I think he should be shunned for such a sick mentality.
  


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September 28, 2008, 10:36 PM 
  #19 
erinf 
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he doesn't know her name but he knows everything else. What a piece of shit! 

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Weird woman... 

Hi Erin,

I don't know her name, but watch the video and you'll get a good look at her. She used to go to Tig's shows and bother her. As I said, she's pretty harmless. She's not going to pull a knife out on you. I think she just gets crushes on female comedians and then bugs them. In the event she bugs you, feel free to tell her to go fuck herself. That usually works with weak people like that.

  


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September 28, 2008, 10:56 PM 
  #20 
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Re: Shenk Flo tonight Adam's Birthday! 9pm All Star Lanes (not that far) 

Boxenbaum is a syco!
  


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09/28 Sun. - Lizzy Cooperman/Nate Craig CD Taping Show - 9pm 
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fake show to get stalker. 
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Check out the New Yorker magazine article from May 19, 2008

LARGO NIGHTS 
Dana Goodyear 
A few days before the Super Bowl this past February, Benmont Tench, who has been playing keyboards with Tom Petty and the Heartbreakers for more than thirty years, took a break from rehearsing, in Tempe, Arizona, for the game's halftime performance to send a text message to a chum in Los Angeles. "This is not Largo, my friend," he wrote, as practice fireworks went off around him. "It's fun, but I wish Sara was standing next to me hitting me with her bow. And Ellen." 

The chum was Mark Flanagan, or Flanny, as his friends call him, who has owned Largo, a small music-and-comedy club on Fairfax, across from Canter's deli, since 1996. Sara is Sara Watkins, the twenty-six-year-old fiddle player from Nickel Creek, who, with her brother Sean, hosts a regular evening at Largo called the Watkins Family Hour. Tench is their pianist. The photographer Ellen Tunney, a petite woman with an orb of gold curls, is Largo's bartender.
The following Thursday, Tench was back at Largo, playing with Sara, Sean, Greg Leisz (pedal steel), and Gabe Wicher (fiddle), to a crowd of about sixty-five. They played some Watkins songs, and one by Tom Brosseau, a sweet, off-kilter singer-songwriter from North Dakota, who is Flanagan's tennis partner and often plays at Largo. After a bit, Sara said, "If Jon B. wants to come up and play with us on this song, he should." 

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September 30, 2008, 12:50 PM 
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Re: Louis CK at Largo - Sunday, September 28 - 8pm 

Quote:
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I hate that I feel the need to get involved in this mess, but lisad is so blaringly the woman that was banned from largo for stalking comics. I would bet the farm that erinf is her 2nd personality.
Yes she is def. erinf and some others as well. Uber crazy.
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September 30, 2008, 2:13 PM 
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Re: Louis CK at Largo - Sunday, September 28 - 8pm 

Quote:
Originally Posted by Wittels 
I hate that I feel the need to get involved in this mess...
I hate that I feel the need to get involved in this mess and say that Harris fucking destroyed as Louis' opener. He brought his big gun and leveled the house, sexily yet with discipline. A+, up the ass.
  


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September 30, 2008, 2:18 PM 
  #16 
lisad 
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Re: Louis CK at Largo - Sunday, September 28 - 8pm 

Quote:
Originally Posted by Wittels 
I hate that I feel the need to get involved in this mess, but lisad is so blaringly the woman that was banned from largo for stalking comics. I would bet the farm that erinf is her 2nd personality. Flanagin, the owner you speak of, is a very classy guy. He wasn't rude to you because you vomitted on a chair. If he was rude to you it was for scaring the bejeesus out of the comics that performed there. So, let's stop slandering Largo here. Thanks.
Excuse me??? What are you talking about? You need to know what you are talking about before you make such acccusations.
  


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September 30, 2008, 2:25 PM 
  #17 
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Re: Louis CK at Largo - Sunday, September 28 - 8pm 

Just don't look.
  


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September 30, 2008, 2:35 PM 
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Re: Louis CK at Largo - Sunday, September 28 - 8pm 

Quote:
Originally Posted by Rob Delaney 
I hate that I feel the need to get involved in this mess and say that Harris fucking destroyed as Louis' opener. He brought his big gun and leveled the house, sexily yet with discipline. A+, up the ass.
Absolutely! I can't remember the last time I saw Harris do even okay. He always kills.
  


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September 30, 2008, 2:35 PM 
  #19 
lisad 
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Re: Louis CK at Largo - Sunday, September 28 - 8pm 

online now! idiots!

erinf, AdvantageSmith, lisad, CapnMonterayJack, KC, danthrax737, DandyFop
  


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September 30, 2008, 2:45 PM 
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From the back of the room, a tall, loping figure in a leather jacket, with thick dark hair and lively eyes set in a pale face, made his way across the floor, carrying a guitar: it was Jon Brion, a virtuosic musician, producer, and composer, who has had an always-sold-out show at Largo for a dozen years. Then Sara invited up another John--"lot of Johns tonight," she said--and it was John Paul Jones, the bassist from Led Zeppelin. There were whispers in the surprised audience. ("There was no way I was going to announce this," Flanagan said to me.) 
They played a John Hartford bluegrass song, with Jones on bass and Brion on a nineteen-fifties Gretsch. Jones, fine-featured and distinguished-looking, smiled mildly as he played. When the song was over, another musician walked onto the stage: the session drummer Jim Keltner (Dylan, Lennon, Harrison, Clapton, Floyd). He sat down at the drum kit and put on a pair of dark glasses. Jones picked up his mandolin, and the group played an instrumental version of the Zeppelin song "Going to California." Keltner leaned back and cast his arm tenderly, like a fisherman. Jones held his mandolin snug to his chest, as if it were a wiggly baby and he had to concentrate to button up its coat. He was blushing with pleasure by the end. 

"Nice boyfriends," Flanagan said to Sara when the show was over and the audience was reluctantly drifting out. 
"That was the most ridiculous band," Brion said. "You couldn't hire that band, you couldn't afford that band, you couldn't get them together. By all accounts it shouldn't have happened." 

Keltner went home; so did Jones. The others sat around till well past midnight, taking turns on Jones's mandolin, which he had left behind. 

Flanagan is six feet two and husky, with wiry cinnamon-colored hair and a snub nose. He is a buoyant soul and a dead-on mimic. (He calls his friends and does them, to them, on their answering machines.) His car is a marshmallow-colored Escalade, and he has three Triumph motorbikes. Under his protection, Largo has become a hothouse for musicians and comedians, and has encouraged hybridization of the two usually divergent strains. The comedian Zach Galifianakis first played the piano, now an integral part of his act, because there was one on the Largo stage. He invited the singer-songwriter Fiona Apple, whom he met at Largo, to sing his punch lines. She asked him to lip-synch to one of her songs in a music video. Then Kanye West, who has performed with Brion at Largo, saw Galifianakis's set, and wanted him to make his video, too. (Galifianakis shot it at his farm in North Carolina; West does not appear in it.) After Aimee Mann and her husband, Michael Penn, asked the Largo comic Patton Oswalt (the voice of Remy in "Ratatouille," among other things) to do their patter for them, they toured together. She recently made a music video featuring a young Largo comedian named Morgan Murphy. "Almost all of my friendships are a direct result of going to Largo, meeting these people, and trying to mix comedy and music," Mann told me. "Largo's the hub of my social life, really." 

Tenacious D, Jack Black's band, bloomed at Largo; Flight of the Conchords played one of their first shows in America there. The director Michel Gondry has been known to come in and play drums. Paul Thomas Anderson, a friend of Flanagan's through Brion, Mann, and Penn--all of whom have written music for his films--has drawn many times from the Largo talent pool, casting performers like Oswalt, Paul F. Tompkins, and Mary Lynn Rajskub. After Anderson wrote Philip Seymour Hoffman's part in "Boogie Nights"--a sad-sack, thwarted hanger-on in the porn scene--Hoffman went to Largo and met a creepy regular, who used to approach the artists, stroke their arms, and murmur, "Hiiiiii." "You'd feel this soft, gentle touch on the back of your shoulder and you knew you were done for," Anderson said. "Once Phil really sized him up, he got a handful of things from him." Even Flanagan has turned up in Anderson's movies, appearing in the opening moments of "Magnolia" as a British thug, and, fleetingly, in the angry-crowd scene near the start of "There Will Be Blood." Anderson is executive producer of "Largo," a film about the club and its performers, which Flanagan codirected with Andrew van Baal and which will premiere at the L.A. Film Festival, in June. 

"I've never been to Flanny's actual place of residence, but in my head when I go to Largo I feel that I'm going to a dinner party at his house," Fiona Apple said. "All my friends are there. The audience is there, too, but they're almost like pigeons on the windowsill, looking in. I don't even think of it as Largo. I think of it as Flanny's place." 

Early in the night, butterscotch Tiffany chandeliers glow dimly over the tables at Largo, but they go off when an artist takes the stage, leaving just the greasy, muted light cast by white votive candles in glass Mason jars. The waiters pour water from pitchers with no ice. Cell phones are forbidden, and there is no talking during the show. 

The burgundy walls are lined with photographs of Flanagan's favorite singers, from Presley to Costello, and his favorite jazz musicians. There is a closeup of Miles Davis that Flanagan shot at a performance in Germany when he was sixteen. Near the bar is a trio of comedians: Buster Keaton, Marty Feldman, and Peter Sellers. Lauretta Feldman, Marty's widow, and Anne Levy, Sellers's first wife, are two of Flanagan's good friends. (Lauretta--a throaty-voiced bohemian with a museumlike house near Mulholland, where Sarah Vaughan once played piano--is rumored to be the intended audience for the shout-out in the Beatles' "Get Back.") Tunney, the bartender, who has worked at Largo for nearly a decade, told me that she was most startled not by Prince, or Madonna, or Paul McCartney, but when she looked up from pouring a glass of champagne for a guest of Lauretta's and saw that it was Tim Curry. "Oh, darling, should I have told you?" Lauretta said. 

In a diffuse city, Largo has a nucleating effect. Tunney likes to introduce fans of a particular artist to one another. Flanagan told me he's been invited to some twenty weddings of couples who met there. It is a modest space--less than a hundred seats--and held together, Flanagan says, with duct tape and spray paint. Brion says, "Flanagan managed to create a world you can walk into and be immersed. Paris is like that--they let one designer build it. When you walk into Largo you're in somebody's vision." Anderson calls Flanagan a "benevolent dictator," albeit a stealthy one. "For the longest time, I didn't know Flanagan's birthday," he said. "He likes to operate like a ghost, like he's not there." Flanagan changes his shirt several times a night, and doesn't like to be photographed. 

The Largo stage, a low platform covered with overlapping Oriental rugs and crowded with instruments and wires, occupies most of the wall that faces Fairfax; noises from the street drift in. The bar holds worn books with gold embossing, and a six of spades tossed from the stage by Ricky Jay. Flanagan has been looking for a bigger space for years, and recently signed a lease on the historic Coronet Theatre, about a mile away, which has two hundred and eighty seats and a proper stage, as well as a smaller space that he plans to fashion as "Little Largo," burgundy walls and all. The first show at the new place will be in early June. 

One winter night, Aimee Mann had a gig at Largo. She walked toward the stage with Flanagan behind her, like a watchful body man. (He guards some artists with special vigor; Mann is one, Apple is another. Of Brion, he says, "I have to hide him before the show. He'll be standing there by the kitchen, and there will be people waiting for him with film scripts.") Flanagan appeared onstage first. "Good evening, girls and boys. Welcome to Aimee Mann's clubhouse," he said quickly, and disappeared. Mann came out with a pianist and a bass player, and played a bunch of new songs from an album that will be coming out next month. 

Glen Hansard, a Dublin musician who starred in "Once" and is an old friend of Flanagan's, slipped in and took a seat at the end of the bar. He was in town for awards season--the music from "Once" was nominated for two Grammys and won an Academy Award. After Mann's show, Flanagan took me through the kitchen and up a steep, rickety flight of stairs that leads to his office and the greenroom. The greenroom couch is leather, and, along with a pair of deep armchairs, came from the set of "Boogie Nights" (they belonged to the Burt Reynolds character). The walls are dark, and plastered with rock and jazz posters; the ceiling slopes, and is festooned with silver tinsel and little pink lights. It is layered, filthy, and historical--a fortress, a fantasy dorm room. 

Mann sat in one of the chairs, a Guinness in her hand. Hansard--blue-eyed, with reddish hair and the naive but tired aspect of a child older than his years--perched on the arm of the chair opposite her. They were meeting for the first time, and Mann was giving Hansard advice about performing at the Oscars. 

Hansard glanced furtively at Flanagan and said, "Hey, I was wondering if I couldn't go in for a bit of a lash while I'm here?" 

"You want to play?" Flanagan asked. "Oh, yeah." 

That's how most Largo shows get booked. 

The loves of Flanagan's life are his girlfriend, Renee, whom he met at a coffee shop, and their one-year-old daughter, Mahalia. When she says "Da-da," she almost sounds English, which he finds disquieting. Flanagan was born Catholic in Belfast in 1964. He is the second child of four in a birth pattern that goes girl-boy-boy-girl--the first three at eighteen-month intervals. His father was a government bureaucrat and his mother was a nurse. When his friends used to call the house and ask for Flanagan, she would say, "There's a house full of 'em," and hang up. She was very pretty and outgoing; her people were publicans. At twelve, to earn money for a guitar, Flanagan worked as a busboy at his grandfather's bar, Lavery's Gin Palace, which is still in the family. Working there, Flanagan decided he wasn't interested in drinking, and he rarely does. 

Lavery's, equally close to the Shankill Road (Protestant) and the Falls Road (Catholic), is unusual for having stood through the Troubles. To save the bar from a bombing attempt, Flanagan's great-uncle carried the explosive outside and was killed when it went off. When the church next door to the Flanagans' house was bombed, and its large metal cross caught fire and crashed through their roof, landing on the kitchen floor, the family decided to move to Sligo, a childhood home of William Butler Yeats. The view from their house was of Ben Bulben; it was painted with the words "BRITS OUT." At eighteen, Flanagan entered a four-year degree program in medicine and psychology; he worked with autistic children, teaching them to sing along to his guitar. 

In his early twenties, Flanagan says, he moved to Boston, with funding from the May Institute, to continue his work on autism. After three years, he decided that Boston was too cold, and he drove to L.A. He was taking some time off from his studies when a friend from Ireland told him that his brother was opening a bar and wanted help. Flanagan invested, and started booking the musicians. After a few weeks, he met Jon Brion. That night, Brion remembers, "we started talking about music. He was frightfully knowledgeable, but more than that he was clearly a music lover. Even some musicians I know are not music lovers. To this day, we can be watching a show, listening to a record, or seeing a movie together, and just at the moment I find I could really get lost in someone I look at him and he's grunting his approval." 

"I like things that are thoughtprovoking, emotional, and have a sense of humor," Flanagan told me. "There's a streak of crazy in the best ones. When you work with very talented artists, it's a very fine line. I worked with autistic children for eight years. You see these similarities. They can tap into the muse so easily." He takes pleasure in the artists' quirks. "She's a complicated shadow, that one," he said, of one neurotic songwriter. Flanagan took over Largo in 1996, and decided that comedians would make a good contrast to the broody, brainy music. "When all the songs are about 'She's leaving, she's gone, she might come back for a while, but she's really leaving,' you need something to counteract it," he said. He asked Lisa Leingang, then a network development executive in Los Angeles and a Largo regular, to book comics for Monday nights. Leingang, who is now the vice-president of programming and development for CBS in New York, recently dug up a notebook that recorded all the Monday-night lineups from 1998; the list included Margaret Cho, Jeff Garlin, Janeane Garofalo, and Dana Gould, a onetime writer for "The Simpsons." Many of them--Sarah Silverman, Greg Proops, Nick Swardson--still perform there, along with a younger batch. Last year, Silverman hired Harris Wittels, a twenty-four-year-old comedian she saw at Largo, to be a writer on her television show. 

Unlike most L.A. comedy clubs, which emphasize tight, perfected monologues and camera-readiness, Largo is known as a place for experimentation. "It's a safer, looser, pure performance space," Scott Landsman, an executive at Comedy Central, says. "But it can be hit-or-miss. You occasionally want to say, 'Come on, dude, could you not have worked it out a little bit in your bathroom mirror?' " 

"Preparation was not necessarily the byword," Stephen Colbert, who appeared at Largo a few times in the late nineties, told me. "I don't know if the audience was especially welcoming, but it surely was forgiving." Sometimes, Zach Galifianakis says, "I'll say a joke that doesn't work, and Flanagan will be dying laughing in the back of the room, because no one else is laughing." 

Careers are launched, or re-launched, there. In 1999, Jeff Garlin asked Leingang to give Larry David a spot on a Monday night. He hadn't done standup in years, and was working out material for an HBO special. They taped the Largo set and used it as part of the special, from which "Curb Your Enthusiasm" was born. Fred Armisen, a player on "Saturday Night Live," told me that when he moved to L.A., in 2000, he started going to Largo alone. "I met Flanagan and described to him what I do, characters and stuff. I was not on a TV show, I was nothing. And he put me on." At Largo, Armisen said, he first tried his deaf-comedian character, and perfected Fericito, the Venezuelan timbales player. When people ask him if he did a lot of standup starting out, he answers, "Pretty much only at Largo." 

Largo inverts the hierarchy of Hollywood: flashing a business card from Comedy Central or Atlantic Records means you won't get in. Entourages are frowned upon, and there is no separate set of rules for celebrities. "He's horrible," I heard Flanagan say of a pompous movie director. "He comes with a group of people that have to get in because they're 'his' people--ugh." During a performance by an Australian rock singer, Flanagan says he had to silence Russell Crowe and a bunch of rowdy Australians, who were doing shots and talking through the set. They left in a huff, and one of them pushed over a candle on his way out. (Crowe denies the whole thing.) If you want a table, you must make a reservation, arrive at eight, and eat dinner. Colin Hay, the former lead singer of Men at Work, says, "You can have the chicken, or the chicken, or you can have that chicken twice baked." Otherwise, you can take your chances in the long line that stretches down the block from the club's front door and hope to get a spot in the back near the bar. 

There is no "list," a policy that dates to Largo's early days, when Brion began to attract huge crowds and music-industry people kept calling and asking, trying to be put on it. Brion told me, "I said to Flanagan, 'What list? What's a list?' He said, 'That's how it's done in Hollywood--regular people pay ten dollars, and if you're on the industry list you pay five.' It's always struck me as funny that the people with the income expect to get in for less or for free. I said, 'Why don't we say, If anyone asks the price, it's five dollars, and if you come in and say you're in the industry it's ten.' "

Zoe Friedman, a development executive whose parents started the Improv, in New York, said, "They don't treat industry people as if they're special. They could care less that I work at Comedy Central and used to work at Letterman. There are a lot of rules, which can be sort of annoying, but once you accept the rules, you sit down, have a nice meal with some friends, and you're committed to it, which is part of what's so satisfying about a night there." She added, "On industry nights at the Improv or the Laugh Factory, I see people that make me embarrassed to be in the industry. They're on their BlackBerries, or talking to the person behind them. I don't see that at Largo." 

Comedians and musicians say that Largo has the best audiences in the city. "You know that saying about how you're performing for the comics in the back of the room?" Sarah Silverman said. "At Largo, the whole crowd feels that way." 

Jon Brion is an eloquent autodidact; as an adolescent he was briefly placed in special-education classes, and he left high school as soon as he was of age. His father was the director of the Yale marching band. Brion taught himself piano by fiddling with the notes, and as a teen-ager he played backup for jazz musicians like Dizzy Gillespie and Benny Carter when they came to New Haven to perform in the public schools. Brion is still an instinctive musician. When he sits down at the beginning of a show, he says, he has no idea what he's going to play. "It starts with an abstraction, then the sound reminds me of a melody, then another melody." His performances are spirited, feverish, and often hammy. He thinks of himself as a funny musician, a quality that is enhanced by the hokey, cranky sound of the turn-of-the-century upright at Largo, which he and Flanagan bought from a Sunday school in Compton. Brion has removed the piano's front panel, to give him access to its strings. 

On a cool, damp Friday night in late February, Brion walked through the back door of Largo, a suitcase in his hand and stubble on his face, two hours before his show. He was coming straight from the studio, wearing yesterday's clothes. His assistant was already there, tending to the eight guitars on a rack on the stage and checking the old amplifier and the mixing board. Flanagan was upstairs in his office, talking to Bobb Bruno, a musician who plays an electric drum pad while wearing a bunny suit, and Liam Finn, a son of Neil, of Crowded House, and a musician, too. 

By ten minutes to nine, there were two hundred people outside the club, restless and cold. Some had been lined up since early evening. Music came on. Michael Griffee, the manager, shouted across the empty room, "Does that mean go?" 

"Yeah, go, go!" Flanagan, who had come downstairs, said, and the first guests entered. Brion was still on the stage, his hair lank and in his face, fiddling with his keyboards: a Chamberlin and two small electronic keyboards perched on the piano. "Every week, I swear that next week I'm going to do an all-ukulele show," he said, and disappeared to the greenroom to get ready, just before Aimee Mann and Michael Penn came in through the back. 

An hour passed. Griffee swooped down and surprised a customer who was using a BlackBerry, his chin lit blue as if by an underworld buttercup; Griffee told him to put it away. Flanagan stood near the kitchen doors listening to the thump-tap of Brion's feet through the ceiling above his head, as Brion warmed up in the greenroom with a guitar. Then he ducked into the sound booth to put on Artie Shaw, the Gramercy Five Sessions, which he does before every Jon Brion show. 

Brion appeared, freshly shaved, wearing a clean shirt, a slender vintage silk tie, and a neatly buttoned leather jacket. Flanagan patted him gently on the back and hustled him to the stage. He sat straight-backed, looking almost Victorian, at the piano, and felt his way toward a ghostly tune. He raised his right arm and strummed the exposed piano strings, making them mewl. 

"Let's have a request!" he called to the crowd after a while, and for the next several hours, racing from drum kit to keyboards to guitar, playing a part and recording it and letting it repeat on a loop, he gave them They Might Be Giants and Bob Dylan and Judy Garland--"Fuck it, I'm just going to play old standards, because that's what I feel like doing!"--and Cole Porter in the style of Les Paul, and, finally, in an experiment he was laughing about even as he pulled it off, "I've Got You Under My Skin" to the tune of "Strawberry Fields Forever." The jacket came off, the eyes rolled back, the hair became unkempt again; his cheeks were polished apples, his guitar a wayward dancing partner he had to dip to take charge of. Ellen Tunney leaned on her elbows at the bar, listening contentedly. Flanagan stood, backlit, by the kitchen doors, catching every note.
  
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By Tom Sharpe 
Offstage, Tig Notaro is loved by fellow comics for the way she combines deadpan mock seriousness with a panoply of characters and sound effects injected into conversation. One minute she’s giving singing lessons by earnestly singing terribly off-key scales, the next she’s making a donkey noise, or slipping on a pair of glasses to portray a persnickety soul she calls “Lezbrarian.” Onstage, on The Sarah Silverman Program, it’s pretty much her in a holster, portraying someone named “Tig.” I called her on her cell to ask about an interview and she told me she was about to step onstage in New York. We caught up the next morning. 
L.A. CityBeat: Hello Tig, What are you doing in New York?
Tig Notaro: Hello, Tom. I’m doing the Eugene Mirman comedy festival. 
Well, that about wraps it up. Did you always know you wanted to do comedy?
I always knew I did. I just didn’t think it was something that was an option for me. I thought that Paula Poundstone got to do it, and Roseanne. 
Didn’t you drop out of school at an early age?
I failed eighth grade twice. I failed ninth grade and then I dropped out. So it wasn’t like I was 12 and out on the street smoking cigarettes. I was 17. 
What did you do when you were 17, then? What was the plan?
Just to smoke cigarettes. 
This always fascinated me, because you strike me as very intelligent – why did you drop out?
I was just so not interested. I felt absolutely crazy every day in class. I knew that running in the hall and chewing gum were not going to make a difference in what I wanted to do. 
We’ve talked before about a common experience we had as kids. As a child you were an aggressive, well, an aggressive bed wetter.
Yes. But it didn’t stop at beds. It was pants, it was carpets that I was sitting on, it was swimming pools, it was anything. If it was there, I was going to wet it. 
You were ambitious.
I think it’s so funny – that distance from things that were so scary to you as a kid and now. Now as an adult, it’s my job to let everyone know my secrets I was trying to keep. It’s unbelievable that I will actually sit onstage and tell people that I had a greasy bowl haircut and I hated to take baths and I wet my pants and reeked of urine and carried a briefcase when I was 9. 
What was in the briefcase, school supplies?
My school supplies. Some Star Wars action figures. 
And some urine.
I had some filed in there. 
You told me a story once about a time you stayed overnight at a friend’s house.
Oh, my God. So, of course, I have to go through the horrible embarrassment of having to explain that I wet their bed. And if that wasn’t horrifying enough, I was outside playing later that day and they had taken the mattress out of the house, to air out on their back porch. While I was trying to play, my shame was holding me down. 
And that was the year that you dropped out of high school.
I think I was in the fifth grade. 
You portray Officer Tig on The Sarah Silverman Program. How did you start working with Sarah?
It was a really intense audition process of becoming her friend. She and I met at a comedy club and she got my phone number seven years ago. And it was a lot of lunches and hikes and hanging out. It was a loooong process. Then, seven years later, she offered me the role. Luckily this part was named “Tig” so everything fell into place. 
How would you describe Officer Tig?
I think it might just be me with a holster on. 
Tell me about your monthly show at Largo.
If I have somebody on the show, I might talk with them, it might be a straight-ahead standup show, it’s kind of whatever. This last show, I interviewed Cheryl Hines from Curb Your Enthusiasm. And Sarah Silverman did a set. Tim Heidecker from Tim and Erik. And TJ Miller. 
Any other projects?
I’ve been trying to develop something with Cheryl Hines. And then the ongoing Crackpot crusade: Wayne McClammy, he directed “I’m F*cking Matt Damon,” that Sarah thing, is attached to it. 
This is the Crackpot Comedy tour I quit after the first show and Martha Kelly kept doing?
Yes, the idea is we go directly to the houses of the comedy fans. It’s doing shows in people’s living rooms, back yards, driveways, anywhere they’ll have us. We show up with a microphone and an amplifier 30 minutes before show time and it’s up to the people who are having it to promote it, get their friends to come. 
And you’ll be in The Sarah Silverman Program premiering ...
It premieres Oct. 8. They’re putting it on right after the new South Park. And they’re showing the second episode on Oct. 9, which is a Thursday and the regular day Sarah’s show is going to be on. 

Check the Largo website for upcoming dates: largo-la.com.
Published: 10/01/2008 
DIGG | del.icio.us | REDDIT 
Other Stories by Tom Sharpe
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Comments
. And, obstruction of justice as well. This is so wrong and ugly and it is all documented. Does tom sharpe or doesn't he live with notaro as she claims? Why would that be censored. Is he not disclosing or is he? That should not be censored.
posted by hogre on 10/10/08 @ 05:41 p.m. 
what a sick world when a weekly of some repute acts this way to cover their tracks... or what? What is the rationale for only keeping positive posts left by flaks.
posted by hogre on 10/10/08 @ 05:59 p.m. 
Hey citybeat,
this is all missing from the page. I wonder where it went.
Comments
funny questions, funny answers!!
posted by ladonafeliz on 10/01/08 @ 07:14 p.m. 
bedwetting is an early funny questions, funny answers!!
posted by ladonafeliz on 10/01/08 @ 07:14 p.m. 
Wow. What censorship sign of sociopathy. She seems like an antisocial personality.
posted by erin on 10/08/08 @ 10:08 a.m. 
can you be so kind as to tell me why she was left behind three grades? was pyromania or cruelty to animals involved?
posted by erin on 10/09/08 @ 08:41 a.m. 
Tom,
great article about your roommate. You should mention that you live together.
posted by hogre on 10/09/08 @ 05:23 p.m. 
Hogre, 
There is an insinuation in your comment. Allow me to clarify: 
Tig and I have performed in several shows together and I consider her a friend. While we've exchanged the occasional email and phone call, I haven't seen her in person in over 10 months. We have never been roommates. There was some talk a number of months ago about a group of comics renting a house together-- I was one of those comics. While Tig and a couple of other comics did move forward with that plan, I've never even set foot in the place. Curious to know how you could possibly have heard about any of this, or where you got your erroneous information that I was currently her roommate. 
Here's who I am: 
I'm a standup comic who's been at it for well over a decade-- this past year and a half I've been inactive due to illness. I know and am on friendly terms with probably half of the comedians in Los Angeles. No exaggeration. Hundreds and hundreds of them. I love comics, from big shot headliners to first year open mikers. You can't do comedy in LA for as long as I have without becoming friends with your fellow comics. (Not unless you're antisocial. Which I'm not, Erin, even though I was a bedwetter and one of the best.) When the editor asked me about writing about comedy for citybeat from time to time I expressed concern. I could write about some brilliant comics, but many of them might also happen to be my friends. It was unavoidable. That's the circle that I run in. Was that a problem? 
She thought I could work it out. Here's my promise: If I write about a comic, they're going to be relevant and excellent at their craft. If there's a relevant relationship, I will disclose it.
posted by tomsharpe on 10/10/08 @ 12:34 a.m. 
Additional clarification because a sentence came out wrong: the circle I run in contains some brilliant comics. I'm not braggin here and saying I'm a brilliant comic. However, I've written many jokes that are brilliantly mediocre. I'm saying after all these years in LA, I am friends with some people who are pretty damn amazing
posted by hogre on 10/10/08 @ 08:10 p.m. 
Hogre, 
Your comments and my initial response may have been inadvertently removed along with some targeted comments, which were removed due to their similarity to a glut of comments left on Tig's videos and website and in emails over the past year by a stalker. This person has been court ordered to refrain from all contact with Tig. This is a painful situation and it's truly unfortunate it has to come up here-- I hope that you find it in your heart to understand the circumstances under which you now feel slighted. And I hope that you will refrain from reposting those inappropriate comments as you did above, without waiting for a response.
Again, I am not Tig's roomate. But, I would call her a friend. I have not spoken to her face to face in over 10 months, although we have communicated occasionally by phone and email. As you can see in the interview, I indicated in the question regarding the crackpot tour that I have collaborated with Tig in the past. I was contacted by Tig a number of months ago when she learned that I might have been looking for a place. She and two other comics were concurrently looking for a 4th roommate in a houseful of comedians. I did not move in with them. 

As a standup comedian active in the Los Angeles scene for well over a decade, I am on friendly terms with hundreds of comedians. I hope that the concern you've voiced really does regard journalistic integrity as opposed to a personal vendetta and that this will answer your question. My relationships with comedians-- and many of the comics who are most newsworthy in Los Angeles are also my friends-- will have it's pros and cons when I write about comedy. I've learned so much about the inner workings of comedy due to my experience working alongside these comics, interacting with them professionally and socially, and I think this experience qualifies me as an expert as to who is at the top of their comedy game, advancing the craft of standup and making a difference in the Los Angeles and national scene. But I acknowledge it is possible that my friendships might color some objectivity. I keep this in mind and I look to radio for a parallel: I feel that if Steve Jones can do a consistently good radio show, maybe I can somehow pull off an occasional article about comedy. My motivation is this: introduce the Los Angeles public to some truly excellent comedy in the city, and in the process, get paid a few dollars to do it. 
I hope this answers your questions
posted by tomsharpe on 10/10/08 @ 09:13 p.m. 
Mr. Sharpe,
I find your comments extremely bizzarre and dubious. I asked you if you were her roommate as I'd heard, and you had all my posts and those of another poster removed. Correction: You left one post that was flattering to you.
Now, you come along and mention that Notaro has a stalker. I don't see how that is relevant in any way to you removing posts that only inquire as to the factual nature of your duties as a journalist to disclose. Your statement as to your motivation: "to introduce the Los Angeles public to some truly excellent comedy in the city, and in the process, get paid a few dollars for it," is cast under a cloud if in fact you live with Notaro. You are acting as a member or the press and there are codas you must adhere to. As you can see, my questions are not answered. In light of such prevarications, your stalker story seems very fishy to me and I can't imagine your editor et al. would approve of such a breach of first amendment rights.
posted by hogre on 10/11/08 @ 08:31 a.m. 
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Seth Olenick Tig has friends 
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Tig Notaro’s advice for the wayward 
By Tom Sharpe 
Offstage, Tig Notaro is loved by fellow comics for the way she combines deadpan mock seriousness with a panoply of characters and sound effects injected into conversation. One minute she’s giving singing lessons by earnestly singing terribly off-key scales, the next she’s making a donkey noise, or slipping on a pair of glasses to portray a persnickety soul she calls “Lezbrarian.” Onstage, on The Sarah Silverman Program, it’s pretty much her in a holster, portraying someone named “Tig.” I called her on her cell to ask about an interview and she told me she was about to step onstage in New York. We caught up the next morning. 
L.A. CityBeat: Hello Tig, What are you doing in New York?
Tig Notaro: Hello, Tom. I’m doing the Eugene Mirman comedy festival. 
Well, that about wraps it up. Did you always know you wanted to do comedy?
I always knew I did. I just didn’t think it was something that was an option for me. I thought that Paula Poundstone got to do it, and Roseanne. 
Didn’t you drop out of school at an early age?
I failed eighth grade twice. I failed ninth grade and then I dropped out. So it wasn’t like I was 12 and out on the street smoking cigarettes. I was 17. 
What did you do when you were 17, then? What was the plan?
Just to smoke cigarettes. 
This always fascinated me, because you strike me as very intelligent – why did you drop out?
I was just so not interested. I felt absolutely crazy every day in class. I knew that running in the hall and chewing gum were not going to make a difference in what I wanted to do. 
We’ve talked before about a common experience we had as kids. As a child you were an aggressive, well, an aggressive bed wetter.
Yes. But it didn’t stop at beds. It was pants, it was carpets that I was sitting on, it was swimming pools, it was anything. If it was there, I was going to wet it. 
You were ambitious.
I think it’s so funny – that distance from things that were so scary to you as a kid and now. Now as an adult, it’s my job to let everyone know my secrets I was trying to keep. It’s unbelievable that I will actually sit onstage and tell people that I had a greasy bowl haircut and I hated to take baths and I wet my pants and reeked of urine and carried a briefcase when I was 9. 
What was in the briefcase, school supplies?
My school supplies. Some Star Wars action figures. 
And some urine.
I had some filed in there. 
You told me a story once about a time you stayed overnight at a friend’s house.
Oh, my God. So, of course, I have to go through the horrible embarrassment of having to explain that I wet their bed. And if that wasn’t horrifying enough, I was outside playing later that day and they had taken the mattress out of the house, to air out on their back porch. While I was trying to play, my shame was holding me down. 
And that was the year that you dropped out of high school.
I think I was in the fifth grade. 
You portray Officer Tig on The Sarah Silverman Program. How did you start working with Sarah?
It was a really intense audition process of becoming her friend. She and I met at a comedy club and she got my phone number seven years ago. And it was a lot of lunches and hikes and hanging out. It was a loooong process. Then, seven years later, she offered me the role. Luckily this part was named “Tig” so everything fell into place. 
How would you describe Officer Tig?
I think it might just be me with a holster on. 
Tell me about your monthly show at Largo.
If I have somebody on the show, I might talk with them, it might be a straight-ahead standup show, it’s kind of whatever. This last show, I interviewed Cheryl Hines from Curb Your Enthusiasm. And Sarah Silverman did a set. Tim Heidecker from Tim and Erik. And TJ Miller. 
Any other projects?
I’ve been trying to develop something with Cheryl Hines. And then the ongoing Crackpot crusade: Wayne McClammy, he directed “I’m F*cking Matt Damon,” that Sarah thing, is attached to it. 
This is the Crackpot Comedy tour I quit after the first show and Martha Kelly kept doing?
Yes, the idea is we go directly to the houses of the comedy fans. It’s doing shows in people’s living rooms, back yards, driveways, anywhere they’ll have us. We show up with a microphone and an amplifier 30 minutes before show time and it’s up to the people who are having it to promote it, get their friends to come. 
And you’ll be in The Sarah Silverman Program premiering ...
It premieres Oct. 8. They’re putting it on right after the new South Park. And they’re showing the second episode on Oct. 9, which is a Thursday and the regular day Sarah’s show is going to be on. 

Check the Largo website for upcoming dates: largo-la.com.
Published: 10/01/2008 
DIGG | del.icio.us | REDDIT 
Other Stories by Tom Sharpe
Related Articles
Comedy 
Feature 
Comments
funny questions, funny answers!!
posted by ladonafeliz on 10/01/08 @ 07:14 p.m. 
Wow. What censorship. And, obstruction of justice as well. This is so wrong and ugly and it is all documented. Does tom sharpe or doesn't he live with notaro as she claims? Why would that be censored. Is he not disclosing or is he? That should not be censored.
posted by hogre on 10/10/08 @ 05:41 p.m. 
what a sick world when a weekly of some repute acts this way to cover their tracks... or what? What is the rationale for only keeping positive posts left by flaks.
posted by hogre on 10/10/08 @ 05:59 p.m. 
Hey citybeat,
this is all missing from the page. I wonder where it went.
Comments
funny questions, funny answers!!
posted by ladonafeliz on 10/01/08 @ 07:14 p.m. 
bedwetting is an early sign of sociopathy. She seems like an antisocial personality.
posted by erin on 10/08/08 @ 10:08 a.m. 
can you be so kind as to tell me why she was left behind three grades? was pyromania or cruelty to animals involved?
posted by erin on 10/09/08 @ 08:41 a.m. 
Tom,
great article about your roommate. You should mention that you live together.
posted by hogre on 10/09/08 @ 05:23 p.m. 
Hogre, 
There is an insinuation in your comment. Allow me to clarify: 
Tig and I have performed in several shows together and I consider her a friend. While we've exchanged the occasional email and phone call, I haven't seen her in person in over 10 months. We have never been roommates. There was some talk a number of months ago about a group of comics renting a house together-- I was one of those comics. While Tig and a couple of other comics did move forward with that plan, I've never even set foot in the place. Curious to know how you could possibly have heard about any of this, or where you got your erroneous information that I was currently her roommate. 
Here's who I am: 
I'm a standup comic who's been at it for well over a decade-- this past year and a half I've been inactive due to illness. I know and am on friendly terms with probably half of the comedians in Los Angeles. No exaggeration. Hundreds and hundreds of them. I love comics, from big shot headliners to first year open mikers. You can't do comedy in LA for as long as I have without becoming friends with your fellow comics. (Not unless you're antisocial. Which I'm not, Erin, even though I was a bedwetter and one of the best.) When the editor asked me about writing about comedy for citybeat from time to time I expressed concern. I could write about some brilliant comics, but many of them might also happen to be my friends. It was unavoidable. That's the circle that I run in. Was that a problem? 
She thought I could work it out. Here's my promise: If I write about a comic, they're going to be relevant and excellent at their craft. If there's a relevant relationship, I will disclose it.
posted by tomsharpe on 10/10/08 @ 12:34 a.m. 
Additional clarification because a sentence came out wrong: the circle I run in contains some brilliant comics. I'm not braggin here and saying I'm a brilliant comic. However, I've written many jokes that are brilliantly mediocre. I'm saying after all these years in LA, I am friends with some people who are pretty damn amazing
posted by hogre on 10/10/08 @ 08:10 p.m. 
Hogre, 
Your comments and my initial response may have been inadvertently removed along with some targeted comments, which were removed due to their similarity to a glut of comments left on Tig's videos and website and in emails over the past year by a stalker. This person has been court ordered to refrain from all contact with Tig. This is a painful situation and it's truly unfortunate it has to come up here-- I hope that you find it in your heart to understand the circumstances under which you now feel slighted. And I hope that you will refrain from reposting those inappropriate comments as you did above, without waiting for a response.
Again, I am not Tig's roomate. But, I would call her a friend. I have not spoken to her face to face in over 10 months, although we have communicated occasionally by phone and email. As you can see in the interview, I indicated in the question regarding the crackpot tour that I have collaborated with Tig in the past. I was contacted by Tig a number of months ago when she learned that I might have been looking for a place. She and two other comics were concurrently looking for a 4th roommate in a houseful of comedians. I did not move in with them. 

As a standup comedian active in the Los Angeles scene for well over a decade, I am on friendly terms with hundreds of comedians. I hope that the concern you've voiced really does regard journalistic integrity as opposed to a personal vendetta and that this will answer your question. My relationships with comedians-- and many of the comics who are most newsworthy in Los Angeles are also my friends-- will have it's pros and cons when I write about comedy. I've learned so much about the inner workings of comedy due to my experience working alongside these comics, interacting with them professionally and socially, and I think this experience qualifies me as an expert as to who is at the top of their comedy game, advancing the craft of standup and making a difference in the Los Angeles and national scene. But I acknowledge it is possible that my friendships might color some objectivity. I keep this in mind and I look to radio for a parallel: I feel that if Steve Jones can do a consistently good radio show, maybe I can somehow pull off an occasional article about comedy. My motivation is this: introduce the Los Angeles public to some truly excellent comedy in the city, and in the process, get paid a few dollars to do it. 
I hope this answers your questions
posted by tomsharpe on 10/10/08 @ 09:13 p.m. 
Mr. Sharpe,
I find your comments extremely bizzarre and dubious. I asked you if you were her roommate as I'd heard, and you had all my posts and those of another poster removed. Correction: You left one post that was flattering to you.
Now, you come along and mention that Notaro has a stalker. I don't see how that is relevant in any way to you removing posts that only inquire as to the factual nature of your duties as a journalist to disclose. Your statement as to your motivation: "to introduce the Los Angeles public to some truly excellent comedy in the city, and in the process, get paid a few dollars for it," is cast under a cloud if in fact you live with Notaro. You are acting as a member or the press and there are codas you must adhere to. As you can see, my questions are not answered. In light of such prevarications, your stalker story seems very fishy to me and I can't imagine your editor et al. would approve of such a breach of first amendment rights.
posted by hogre on 10/11/08 @ 08:31 a.m. 
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Actually I have researched this issue extensively, now that I know we are talking about the DVPA and not the other types of restraining orders. 
It is difficult to reopen the case after an appeal unless you can prove extrinsic fraud, not just intrinsic fraud such as perjury. 
However, I believe the orders against you are VOID and you can make a motion to VACATE those orders as follows: 
1.The orders are void because the definition of "abuse" in the DVPA, Cal Family Code § 6203(d) is facially unconstitutional as overly broad under the First Amendment to the US Constitution. I argued that exact motion in Humboldt County yesterday, and the Court took it under submission. 

CCP 473(d) allows you to move to vacate a void order at any time. 
Here is some of what was argued: 
1.The Domestic Violence Prevention Act ("DVPA") is facially unconstitutional as overly broad and vague under Article 1, Section 2(a) of the California Constitution and the First Amendment of the United States Constitution as made applicable to California by the Fourteenth Amendment. 
2.The DVPA is facially unconstitutional as overly broad and vague under Article 1, Section 7 of the California Constitution and the Due Process Clause of the Fourteenth Amendment. 
3.The trial court had no jurisdiction to enter any orders against respondent under the DVPA. 
/// 
As presently in force, the DVPA defines "abuse" to include perfectly legal expressive conduct including mailing innocent letters and making innocent telephone calls. The DVPA now punishes pure speech and is so broadly drawn it prohibits "not only unprotected speech, but also protected speech." Ketchens v. Reiner (1987) 239 Cal.Rptr. 549, 194 Cal.App.3d 470, 475. The DVPA also makes conduct which was innocent and lawful when performed grounds for a permanent restraining order whereby people can lose possession of their property and end up homeless. //// 
There is no doubt that the DVPA specifically targets speech. The official California Courts Domestic Violence Restraining Order Self Help Center at 
http://www.courtinfo.ca.gov/selfhelp/protection/dv/canhelp.htm#whatisabuse states: "Abuse can be spoken, written, or physical." As authoritatively interpreted on that official government website, the DVPA allows issuance of restraining orders based exclusively on activities that are protected by the First Amendment. People have the right to send letters and make telephone calls under both the First Amendment to the United States Constitution as well as under Article 1, Section 2 of the California Constitution. 
According to the 501(c)(4) organization known as Respecting Accuracy in Domestic Abuse Reporting, California is one of only seven states with domestic violence laws that present an extremely high risk of civil rights violations. See http://www.mediaradar.org/docs/RADARreport-Ranking-of-States-DV-Laws.pdf at page 3 of that URL. 
It does not matter how wonderful the purposes of the DVPA may be. It does not matter that abusive conduct could be regulated by a statute drawn with narrow specificity. Gooding v. Wilson (1972) 405 U.S. 518, 520; Lewis v. City Of New Orleans (1974) 415 U.S. 130, 133. The DVPA is facially overbroad. City of Houston v. Hill (1987) 482 U.S. 451, at 458 et seq., 96 L.Ed.2d 398, 410; Ketchens v. Reiner (1987) 239 Cal.Rptr. 549, 194 Cal.App.3d 470, 474-477. 
THE DVPA IS VOID FOR VAGUENESS 
'The dissent of Justice Douglas in Karlan v. City of Cincinnati (1974) 416 U.S. 924 states: "The 'void for vagueness' doctrine is, of course, a due process concept implementing principles of fair warning and non-discriminatory enforcement." Justice Douglas observed that a vague statute may also be overbroad, and stated: "A statute is also overbroad, however, if, even though it is clear and precise, it prohibits constitutionally protected conduct." Karlan v. City of Cincinnati, supra, 416 U.S., at 925. The DVPA is both vague and overbroad. 
The DVPA gives the trial court the same unfettered discretion given to the police prior to Kolender v. Lawson (1983) 461 U.S. 352, 361, 75 L.Ed.2d 903. No standard of proof is defined by the DVPA, although it mentions "reasonable proof". At the trial in this action, petitioner's attorneys argued the court should apply that completely undefined standard as the quantum of proof in this action. Respondent argued that under Evidence Code § 502 the quantum of proof could only be either proof by a preponderance of the evidence, or proof by clear and convincing evidence. 
During his closing argument respondent argued that due process and equal protection concerns required application of the clear and convincing standard.He pointed out that the draconian measures which can be ordered under the DVPA far exceed the consequences of an order entered under the civil harassment law, Code of Civil Procedure § 527.6. Perhaps for that reason the court in this action announced it would apply the clear and convincing standard but nothing in the DVPA requires that and at least one court has stated in dicta that the clear and convincing standard does not apply to injunctions sought under the DVPA. Nakamura v. Parker (2007) 156 Cal.App.4th 327. 
"A statute not sufficiently certain is repugnant to the due process clause." Orloff v. Los Angeles Turf Club (1951) 36 Cal.2d 734, 739. At that same page, the Orloff opinion declared: "The requirement that a law be definite and its meaning ascertainable by those whose rights and duties are affected applies not only to penal statutes but to all laws governing fundamental rights and duties." 
The DVPA is vague and it "impermissibly delegates basic policy matters to [] judges [] for resolution on an ad hoc and subjective basis, with the attendant dangers of arbitrary and discriminatory application." Ketchens v. Reiner (1987) 239 Cal.Rptr. 549, 194 Cal.App.3d 470, 477. As stated there, "laws must provide explicit standards for those who apply them." This applies especially where "the literal wording of the statute" prohibits lawful speech. City of Houston v. Hill (1987) 482 U.S. 451, 457, 96 L.Ed.2d 398, 409. 
The absence of "ascertainable standards of guilt" makes the DVPA void for vagueness. Papachristou v. City of Jacksonville (1972) 405 U.S. 156, at 165, 31 L.Ed.2d 110. See Comment, The Void for Vagueness Rule in California (1953) 41 Ca.L. 523. 
/// 

THE DVPA IS VOID FOR VAGUENESS 
"It would be a singular and a very extraordinary provision that [] the manner in which this quasi-judge should execute his duty should not be prescribed…" Scott v. Negro Ben (1810) 10 U.S. 3, 7, 3 L.Ed. 135. This is the earliest example of the U.S. Supreme Court applying what is now called the void for vagueness doctrine. Myriad cases have held that "laws must provide explicit standards for those who apply them." Wright v. New Jersey (1985) 469 U.S. 1146, 1148. See Ketchens v. Reiner (1987) 194 Cal.App.3d 470, 477; Kolender v. Lawson (1983) 461 U.S. 352, 358, 75 L.Ed.2d 903; Papachristou v. City of Jacksonville (1972) 405 U.S. 156, at 165; Grayned v. City of Rockford (1972) 408 U.S. 104, 108 and cases there cited in fn. 4; Katz v. Superior Court (1977) 73 Cal.App.3d 952, 969. See People v. Heitzman (1994) 9 Cal.4th 189, 199. 
The undefined "reasonable proof" standard in Family Code § 6300 suffers from the same infirmity as the statute at issue in Smith v. Goguen (1974) 415 U.S. 566 which punished anyone who "publicly… treats contemptuously the flag of the United States." 415 U.S. 566, at 568-569. The Smith court held that that "provision is vague 'not in the sense that it requires a person to conform his conduct to an imprecise but comprehensible normative standard, but rather in the sense that no standard of conduct is specified at all.' Coates v. City of Cincinnati, 402 U. S. 611, 614 (1971). Such a provision simply has no core. This absence of any ascertainable standard for inclusion and exclusion is precisely what offends the Due Process Clause. The deficiency is particularly objectionable in view of the unfettered latitude thereby accorded law enforcement officials and triers of fact." Smith v. Goguen (1974) 415 U.S. 566, at 578. See Connally v. General Construction Co. (1926) 269 U.S. 385, 392-395. 
Absence of standards to guide the decision maker renders a statute unconstitutionally vague. Giaccio v. Pennsylvania (1966) 382 U.S. 399, 402-403; Kolender v. Lawson, supra; City of Houston v. Hill (1987) 482 U.S. 451. We as a society do not delegate unrestricted power to decision makers. Kent v. Dulles (1958) 357 U.S. 116, 129-130; Chicago v Morales (1999) 527 U.S. 41, 60-64; In re Oliver (1948) 333 U.S. 527; Gatto v. County of Sonoma (2002) 98 Cal.App.4th 744, 775-776; Saia v. New York (1947) 334 U.S. 558, 560-562; J.L. Thomas, Inc. v. County of Los Angeles (1991) 232 Cal.App.3d 916, 925; Long Beach Lesbian and Gay Pride, Inc. v. City of Long Beach (1993) 14 Cal.App.4th 312. 
The word "unreasonable" has been held to be unconstitutionally vague. Cline v. Frink Dairy Co. (1927) 274 U.S. 445, 453-454, citing U.S. v. L. Cohen Grocery Co. (1921) 255 U.S. 81. City of Lakewood v. Plain Dealer Publishing Co. (1988) 486 U.S. 750, 772 held the phrase "necessary and reasonable" facially unconstitutional as allowing unfettered discretion to the mayor to grant or deny a permit for a newspaper dispenser. 
The DVPA violates respondent's rights to due process of law because the undefined "reasonable proof" standard delegates unrestricted and effectively unreviewable power to the trial court to determine if domestic violence has occurred under a statute that has no standard of decision. To make matters worse, the DVPA does this in a way that defines "abuse" to include activity protected by freedom of speech and expression. Family Code § 6203, § 6320. 
As stated in Logan v. Zimmerman Brush Co. (1982) 455 U.S.422, 432, "Each of our due process cases has recognized, either explicitly or implicitly, that, because 'minimum [procedural] requirements [are] a matter of federal law, they are not diminished by the fact that the State may have specified its own procedures that it may deem adequate for determining the preconditions to adverse official action.' (Citations.)" 
/// 
FIRST AMENDMENT STANDING 
"Under the First Amendment overbreadth doctrine, an individual whose own speech or conduct may be prohibited is permitted to challenge a statute on its face". Airport Commissioners v. Jews for Jesus (1987) 482 U.S. 569, 574-577. 
"At least when statutes regulate or proscribe speech ... the transcendent value to all society of constitutionally protected expression is deemed to justify allowing 'attacks on overly broad statutes with no requirement that the person making the attack demonstrate that his own conduct could not be regulated by a statute drawn with the requisite narrow specificity.'"Los Angeles Police Dept. v. United Reporting Publishing Corp. (1999) 528 U.S. 32, 38. See In re Berry (1968) 68 Cal.2d 137, 152 n. 11. 
The DVPA defines "abuse" to include protected speech. Family Code § 6203(d). The DVPA allows ex parte TROs that restrain speech. Family Code § 6320(a). "Any system of prior restraints of expression comes to this Court bearing a heavy presumption against its constitutional validity." New York Times Co. v. United States (1971) 403 U.S. 713, 714. 
"A law directed at the communicative nature of conduct must, like a law directed at speech itself, be justified by the substantial showing of need that the First Amendment requires." Texas v. Johnson (1989) 491 U.S. 397, 406. 
Petitioner argues that the DVPA is not overbroad and asserts that because the restraining orders granted to petitioner are content neutral the proper First Amendment analysis should be under the less stringent standard applied in United States v. O'Brien (1968) 391 U.S. 367, a case in which respondent expressed his opinions by publicly burning his draft card. The law forbidding destruction of that card did not specifically target speech and was held to have only an incidental impact on free speech and expression. In such circumstances the Supreme Court held the law justified under the standard quoted at 3:3-7 of petitioner's opposition to respondent's motion to vacate filed January 3, 2008. 
The DVPA sections defining "abuse" specifically target speech and are more analogous to the content neutral regulation held facially unconstitutional as overbroad in Airport Commissioners v. Jews for Jesus (1987) 482 U.S. 569 than to the regulation in United States v. O'Brien (1968) 391 U.S. 367 which had only an incidental impact on free speech. Because the DVPA allows prior restraint of speech, it is presumptively unconstitutional under New York Times Co. v. United States (1971) 403 U.S. 713, 714. 
The O'Brien analysis was applied in Mejia v. City of Los Angeles (2007) 156 Cal.App.4th 151, cited at page 3 of petitioner's opposition to respondent's motion to vacate filed January 3, 2008. Mejia held that Code of Civil Procedure § 1021.5 does not violate the First Amendment under the O'Brien analysis. Petitioner's opposition to respondent's motion to vacate, at 3:15-16 states, "The government's interest in enacting the DVPA was to protect against domestic violence. This intent is unrelated to the suppression of free expression." 
The "intent" of the DVPA is irrelevant because the DVPA specifically targets speech and allows prior restraints of speech. O'Brien does not apply to such enactments, which should be analyzed under the standards set forth in New York Times Co. v. United States (1971) 403 U.S. 713 or at least under the standards set forth in Houston v. Hill (1987) 482 U.S. 451, 460 and Airport Commissioners v. Jews for Jesus (1987) 482 U.S. 569, 574-577. Furthermore, "merely stating a laudable purpose" is not "sufficient to justify a restriction on free expression." People v. Glaze (1980) 27 Cal.3d 841, at 848. 

/// 
I believe you have enough to go on now to file a motion to vacate the DVPA orders.

Edited by N Cal Attorney on July 25 2008 at 8:27 PM 

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Comments
funny questions, funny answers!!
posted by ladonafeliz on 10/01/08 @ 07:14 p.m. 
bedwetting is an early sign of sociopathy. She seems like an antisocial personality.
posted by erin on 10/08/08 @ 10:08 a.m. 
can you be so kind as to tell me why she was left behind three grades? was pyromania or cruelty to animals involved?
posted by erin on 10/09/08 @ 08:41 a.m. 
Tom,
great article about your roommate. You should mention that you live together.
posted by hogre on 10/09/08 @ 05:23 p.m. 
Hogre, 
There is an insinuation in your comment. Allow me to clarify: 
Tig and I have performed in several shows together and I consider her a friend. While we've exchanged the occasional email and phone call, I haven't seen her in person in over 10 months. We have never been roommates. There was some talk a number of months ago about a group of comics renting a house together-- I was one of those comics. While Tig and a couple of other comics did move forward with that plan, I've never even set foot in the place. Curious to know how you could possibly have heard about any of this, or where you got your erroneous information that I was currently her roommate. 
Here's who I am: 
I'm a standup comic who's been at it for well over a decade-- this past year and a half I've been inactive due to illness. I know and am on friendly terms with probably half of the comedians in Los Angeles. No exaggeration. Hundreds and hundreds of them. I love comics, from big shot headliners to first year open mikers. You can't do comedy in LA for as long as I have without becoming friends with your fellow comics. (Not unless you're antisocial. Which I'm not, Erin, even though I was a bedwetter and one of the best.) When the editor asked me about writing about comedy for citybeat from time to time I expressed concern. I could write about some brilliant comics, but many of them might also happen to be my friends. It was unavoidable. That's the circle that I run in. Was that a problem? 
She thought I could work it out. Here's my promise: If I write about a comic, they're going to be relevant and excellent at their craft. If there's a relevant relationship, I will disclose it.
posted by tomsharpe on 10/10/08 @ 12:34 a.m. 
Additional clarification because a sentence came out wrong: the circle I run in contains some brilliant comics. I'm not braggin here and saying I'm a brilliant comic. However, I've written many jokes that are brilliantly mediocre. I'm saying after all these years in LA, I am friends with some people who are pretty damn amazing at creating comedy.
posted by tomsharpe on 10/10/08 @ 12:50 a.m. 

Did Alisa Spitzberg really ever harass, stalk or even bother Notaro? Did Lauren ever harass Notaro?

Is Notaro a liar who has lied under oath and under penalty of perjury?


Notaro’s statement to LAPD- as to the August 29, 2007 “incident.
In September 2007 - Spitzberg arrived at the coffee shop and confronted Willen and Notaro. Willen ignored Spitzberg and walked out of the shop with Notaro. Spitzberg stepped in front of Willen and said, “You trying to avoid me.” Willen ignored Spitzberg who then pushed Notaro.

Notaro and Willen left without reporting the incident.

Notaro statement to Spector –investigator for Public Defender
While sitting together and waiting at tsunamis café late one night for this deaf landlord to show up Notaro said that Alisa all of a sudden and surprisingly walked in. Notaro stated that Alisa immediately walked up to their table and “accused” them meaning herself and Willen of being together. Notaro stated Alisa then began yelling and cussing at the two of them. Notaro said is was very much a verbal tirade against the two of them. While Alisa continued yelling at both of them Notaro said a mini bottle of vodka fell out of one. of Spitzberg’s jacket pockets. At one point while all of this was going on Notaro said she then stood up and she was now standing right next to Alisa.

After standing up, Notaro stated that Alisa then Shoved her with both her hands, as well as she next said, “ are you Steph’s keeper.”
After that had occurred Notaro advised that both she and Willen then left this coffee shop, due to the fact they didn’t want any more violence to occur on Alisa’s part. As they quickly walked out of this coffee shop, Notaro said that Alisa continued to follow them out of this location on foot.
Sworn affidavit of Mathilde Notaro- as to the August 29, 2007 “incident.
In late August of 2007, I accompanied my friend Stephanie to the Tsunami Café in Silverlake, CA. Alisa Spitzberg approached us at our table and aggressively yelled insults at the two of us, including, “fucking dyke,.” “ugly.” “cunt,” “bitch.” Etc.
We ignored her and went outside, but she followed us and became angrier and more belilligerent. As I motioned for Stephanie to gather her belongings to leave, Alisa came closer and pushed me.





Court testimony of notaro describing August 29,2007

LANDLORD AT SUNAMI CAFE."  AND IT WAS MAYBE 8:00  O'CLOCK AT NIGHT.
   AND I SAID:  "THAT DOESN'T MAKE
SENSE.  IT DOES NOT SOUND SAFE."
“SO I HAD COFFEE WITH STEF, AND ALISA WALKED IN. AND WHEN SHE SAW US SITTING TOGETHER, SHE SAID -- SHE SAT DOWN AND WAS LIKE: 
OH ARE YOU GUYS BACK TOGETHER?AND WE WERE JUST IGNORING HER.  SHE WAS VERY AGGRESSIVE, AND VERY JUST PERSISTENT AND GOT IN OUR SPACE WE IGNORED HER.  AND THEN A BOTTLE OF VODKA FELL OUT OF HER PURSE, AND SHE PUT IT BACK IN HER PURSE, AND SHE KEPT  SAYING:  "YOU KNOW, YOU GUYS LOOK GREAT TOGETHER.  THIS IS GREAT," AND, YOU KNOW, WHATEVER. SHE SAID:  "ARE YOU TRYING TO AVOID ME?"
I KEPT SAYING TO STEF TO JUST IGNORE HER, JUST IGNORE HER. THEN ALISA SAID:  "OH, ARE  YOU HER FUCKING KEEPER?"
   I SAID, "GO GET YOUR STUFF.   LET'S JUST GO." AND WHEN I DID, ALISA GOT IN MY FACE AND PUSHED ME. 

AND THEN STEF WENT IN TO GET HER STUFF.  WE WALKED OUT OF THE CAFE TOWARDS THE -- WHERE WE WERE PARKED ON THE  STREET, AND ALISA FOLLOWED US AGAIN CALLING US DISGUSTING BULL DIKES, CUNTS, JUST ALL THESE HORRENDOUS NAMES.



Willen’s Statement from Follow up investigation - august 29th 2007 “incident.”

Notaro waited with Willen at approximately 2000 hours, Spitzberg arrived at sat down next to Willen and Notaro.. Spitzberg appeared intoxicated and began interrupting and insulting Notaro and Willen. Spitzberg told Willen that she was “horrible and despicable.” And “how could I be so wrong about you.” Willen walked outside and spitzberg called Willen a, “ Dumb ugly dyke.” Spitzberg then pushed Notaro. Willen stepped between Notaro and Spitzberg, and Notaro suggested they leave. Notaro and Willen walked away while Spitzberg shouted insults at them.
Court testimony of willen as to august 29,2007- transcript --- pg. 20
MS. WILLEN:  YES, IT IS.      THE COURT:  WHEN WAS THAT?
MS. WILLEN:  I BELIEVE I WAS THERE AT 7:00.  TIG   CAME AFTERWARDS, AND I'M NOT QUIET SURE, BUT I BELIEVE IT  WAS AROUND 8:00, A LITTLE AFTER.
THE COURT:  THAT'S 8:00 IN THE EVENING?
MS. WILLEN:  YES.
THE COURT:  DID SHE SPEAK TO MS. NOTARO MS. WILLEN:  YES, SHE SPOKE AT US.
THE COURT:  OKAY.  WHAT DID SHE SAY?
WILLEN: A SLURRY OF HOSTILE WORDS. SHE STARTED WITH WHAT BASICLY --"OH, YOU GUYS ARE TOGETHER.YOU LOOK GREAT.  YOU LOOK GREAT. TOGETHER. NO WONDER ALL THE GALS LIKE YOU. LOOKS LIKE YOU ARE WEARING THE SAME PANTS." THEN IT MOVED ON TO -- WE WEREN'T RESPONDING TO HER.  WE WERE JUST TALKING AS IF SHE WASN'T THERE.  SHE GOT MORE HOSTILE AND MORE IN OUR FACE.  AND SHE JUST DID STUFF -- TRYING TO DENIGRATE OUR CHARACTER;
YOU KNOW:YOU GUYS ARE UGLY.  HOW COULDYOU DO THIS TO ME.  HOW COULD YOU NOT TALK TO ME; YOU ACT LIKE YOU DON'T
LIKE YOU DON'T
EVEN KNOW ME."




And if she now Notaro contendes that the harassment started here, was there ever really harassment? Not according to Heidi Feigin “the agent” Notaro places right there and not according to Griffee,
Notaro From Police report –April 7.2008- 9 months later!

On April 7, 2008 Notaro was performing at Largo. At approximately 2130 hours Notaro was talking to her agent when Spitzerg stepped in front of her and stated, “ You remember me?” Notaro told Spitzberg that she did not want to talk to her. Spitzberg
continued staying in front of Notaro. Notaro asked security to remove Spitzberg.
Notaro’s statement in Affidavit- April 7, 2008

On the evening of April 7, 2,008. I performed at Largo in Hollywood, CA.. After I got off stage alisa approached me to ask if I remembered her. I said plainly, “Yes, I do.” And then continued a conversation I was having with my agent. Alisa interrupted saying “no you don’t remember me. I said, Yes the night we met you were being aggressive and you pushed me. I remember you and I don’t want to talk to you at all. Leave me alone. Alisa became quickly enraged and insisted repeatedly that I was lying. Because I was afraid it would escalate, I had Michael Griffee, the doorman at largo, escort her out of the building.

transcript testimony of Notaro of april 7 –gets date wrong but insignificant
MS. NOTARO:  ON APRIL 12 SHE SHOWED UP, AND AFTER SHE SHOWED, I WAS SPEAKING TO MY AGENT, ALISA INTERRUPTED ME, AND SAID:"YOU DON'T REMEMBER ME.  DO YOU REMEMBER ME?" I SAID, "I DO," AND THEN TURNED BACK TO MY AGENT. THEN SHE INTERRUPTED ME AGAIN.  SHE SAID "I DON'T THINK YOU REMEMBER ME." I SAID, "I DO REMEMBER YOU.  TIME I MET YOU YOU WERE AGGRESSIVE. YOU PUSHED ME, AND I DON'T WANT TO TALK TO YOU AT ALL."THEN SHE GOT IN MY FACE AND -- IF YOU WILL EXCUSE ME, I WILL TELL YOU WHAT SHE SAID.
THE COURT:  TELL ME WHAT SHE SAID
MS. NOTARO: SHE CALLED ME A CRAZY DIKE CUNT GOT IN THE MY FACE.  AND AT THAT POINT I HAD THE SECURITYREMOVE HER, AND HE IS ALSO HERE.SHE SHOWED UPCLAIMING THAT SHE DIDN'T KNOW THAT I WAS PERFORMING THERE AND SHE SHOWED UP – SHE'S STALKING  THIS PERSON THAT WE HAVE IN COMMON FOR THE PAST YEAR, SO I  KNOW SHE CAME TO THE SHOW LOOKING FOR STEPHANIE.

Notaro’s statement to investigator for PD given
Notaro said the next occasion, in which she had any type of contact with Alisa had occurred on 4/7/08. On that particular evening Notaro said she was performing at a club called Largo, and her show that night was called “Tig and friends.”
Sometimes during that evening Notaro said she had seen Alisa sitting inside of this club and near the bar area. Notaro advised that her brand new agent Heidi was also in attendance to see her perform her comedy show. After her show was over Notaro said she was in the audience and she was speaking to her agent.
All of a sudden, Notaro stated that Alisa then walked up to the two of them and said, “ Do you know who I am?” Do you remember me? Notaro replied back to her and said, “I know who you are . You shoved me.” After this brief encounter, Notaro said she walked to an employee who works at Largo, named Micheal, and he had asked Alisa to leave the location at her request. Alisa then left the location.

Heidi Feigin- was notaro’s agent and went to see her that night. Neil Spector investigator’s report for public defender.
Before her show even began notoro advised that Notaro walked up to the table where she was sitting at and she seemed upset at the time .She said she asked to notoro what was wrong and notoro told her something to the effect of “ this woman who has caused her a lot of problems is here.” Heidi stated that Notaro continued to tell her that she meaning Notaro had even needed to get a “restraining order” against this same female subject. As Notoro continued to speak with her, Heidi said this unknown female subject in question all of a sudden walked by the table where they had been talking at, and this unknown female subject said “hi” to someone and this unknown female subject continued on her way.
Heidi stated that Notaro told her, “that is the ex-girlfriend of my girlfriend and she’s causing a lof of problems for us.” She said Notoro had also said something to her about this female subject was also “stalking” her. Feigin stated that after this female subject walked by them, she sat at the bar area by herself. Heidi stated that Notaro then left her table, and she performed a short time later.
When asked if this female subject caused any trouble at the show at Largo at this night in question, Feigin said no. Feigin Advised that this unknown subject just appeared to be a “normal fan.” And she had caused no problems on that particular evening. She stated she had just sat at the back of this club and next to the bar while watching the show. When asked if she had seen this unknown female subject ever make contact with Notaro on that night in question, Feigin said no. When asked if she knew the unknown subject’s name, Feigin once again stated no.



Griffee’s account of april 7th pg. 11,12

THE COURT:  WHY DID YOU ASK HER TO LEAVE THE CLUB?
MR. GRIFFEE:  TIG EXPRESSED THAT SHE FELT THREATENED BY THE DEFENDANT, AND SHE ASKED IF I WOULD ASK HER TO LEAVE.  AND, OF COURSE, IN MY LINE OF WORK, IF MY  ARTIST FEELS UNCOMFORTABLE ABOUT ANYTHING, I ASK THEM TO   LEAVE.
 THE COURT:  DID YOU TELL MS. SPITZBERG TO LEAVE?
 MR. GRIFFEE:  YES.    
THE COURT:  WHAT DID SHE SAY TO YOU?
MR. GRIFFEE:  SHE SAID "WHY?"     I SAID, "YOU ARE MAKING TIG FEEL UNCOMFORTABLE."SHE SAID, "WELL, I DIDN'T DO ANYTHING TO HER. I SAID -- YOU KNOW, I DIDN'T WITNESS ANY INTERACTION BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM.  I SAID:  "YOU KNOW, IT'S MY JOB HERE TO MAKE MY ARTIST FEEL COMFORTABLE, SO I WILL HAVE TO ASK YOU TO LEAVE."
THE COURT:  DID SHE LEAVE PEACEFULLY?
MR. GRIFFEE:  BASICLY, YES.  IT WAS AFTER THE SHOW, SO THERE WAS PEOPLE LEAVING AT THAT POINT THAT THE  CLUB WAS KIND OF EMPTYING OUT.  I WALKED HER TO THE FRONT   DOOR, AND THEN, AS -- WHEN SHE GOT TO THE FRONT DOOR, SHE
  JUST SAID:  "YOU KNOW, SHE'S CRAZY. SHE SAYS I DID ALL THIS STUFF
     TO HER.  SHE'S CRAZY."SHE KEPT SAYING HOW TIG WAS CRAZY AND SHE DIDN'T   DO ANYTHING.  I SAID: "THAT'S NOT MY PLACE TO JUDGE.
YOU NEED TO LEAVE NOW.


Griffee’s account April 7th, 2008 in the same transcript a few minutes/pages later.

THE COURT: IN EITHER OCCASION IN APRIL, DID YOU SEE MS. NOTARO AND MS. SPITZBERG TALK TO EACH OTHER?
MR. GRIFFEE: YES.

THE COURT: WHAT DID YOU WITNESS THEM SAY TO EACH OTHER?

GRIFFEE:I DON'T KNOW. IT WAS AFTER THE CLUB -- THE MUSIC WAS UP. THERE WAS PEOPLE ALL AROUND ME TALKING. I WAS STANDING AT THE END OF THE -- I WAS STANDING IN THE KITCHEN, AND THE DOOR HAD OPENED.TIG -- MS. NOTARO WAS AT THE END OF THE BAR. ISAID, MICHAEL -- MICHAEL AND I JUST CAME OUT FROM THE KITCHEN AND SAID WHAT'S UP, AND SHE JUST SAID, YOU KNOW,THIS PERSON IS ACTING AGGRESSIVE AND THREATENING AND I DON'T KNOW ANY HISTORY OR ANYTHING. SAY, OH, LET ME TAKE CARE OF THAT. I SAID, "TIG, GO TO THE KITCHEN." I WAS WALKING PAST HER AND THE DEFENDANT AND HER HAD WORDS. I DON'T REMEMBER EXACTLY WHAT. THE DEFENDANT WAS JUST SAYING, YOU KNOW: "WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT YOU ARE CRAZY. YOU ARE CRAZY."


Or is this when the stalking, threats and harassment started. Julius Quinn Robert’s affidavidit will show Notaro is lying and Griffee and Seccia will eventually show that not only is Notaro lying but they are too.

Police report – April 12, 2008 incident-  Statement by notaro
On April 12th 2008 Notaro was standing outside Largo. At approximately 2130 hours, Notaro was standing outside with owner, Mark Flanagan Notaro saw Spitzberg and her sister running towards her. She ran inside and security closed the doors.

Spitzberg pounded on the doors and yelled, “where gonna get that fucking dyke!” Security kept the doors closed for over an hour.

The police were called but Spitzberg had left before they arrived.
. April 12 Incident

The next night I performed at Largo was April 12th , 2008., I was standing outside the club with the owner Mark Flanagan. I noticed Alisa and her sister, Lauren Spitzberg, about fifteen feet away from my right. They ran towards me and lunged at me, and I ran inside before they could make physical contact. They were not allowed entrance into the club, and Mark Flanagan called the police.

Alisa and Lauren went around to the back door, and for an hour and a half proceeded to verbally abuse Mark Flanagan and Michael Griffee, scream at the top of their lungs, and bang on the door.

They ran back and forth from the front to back entrance yelling, “were going to get that dyke.” They left close to 11 p.m before the police could come.

Notaro’s testimony Transcript April 12th
MS. NOTARO:  THE FOLLOWING SATURDAY NIGHT I WAS   PERFORMING AGAIN, AND I WAS OUTSIDE OF THE VENUE TALKING TO
  THE OWNER OF THE CLUB, AND I LOOKED TO MY RIGHT AND ALISA AND HER SISTER RIGHT AS I TURNED TO MY RIGHT WERE RUNNING  DOWN THE SIDEWALK TOWARDS ME.  I WENT INSIDE.  THE OWNER  SHUT THE DOOR, WOULDN'T LET THEM IN.
AT THAT POINT THEY HAD TO LOCK THE DOOR BECAUSE THEY WERE KICKING AND BEATING THE DOOR SAYING WE'RE GOING
TO GET THAT FUCKING DIKE. 

AND THEN THEY WENT AROUND TO THE  BACK.  THAT'S WHEN AGAIN MY BACK DOOR GUY FROM LARGO, THE HAD TO LOCK THE BACK DOOR, AND THEY CONTINUED DOING THAT FOR AN HOUR AND A HALF.  AND THEN KEVIN, WHO I'VE ALSO
BROUGHT, WAS SOMEBODY THAT WAS AT THE VENUE THAT NIGHT, ANJUST; SAYING:  "WE'RE GOING TO GET THA FUCKING DIKE.  SHE BETTER WATCH HER BACK.

Notaro statement to Neil Spector

Notaro said a few nights later, Alisa once again showed up at Largo. This time she brought her sister along with her. When Alisa first showed up on this second night Notaro stated that she had been outside and talking with its owner Mark Flanagan Notaro said that Flanagan told her to immediately get inside the club and he would take care of Alisa and her sister. Notaro also advised that the police also showed up that evening at Largo but she believed that Alisa and her Sister had already left Largo. Prior to the police arriving there. She said that she carried on with her performance that evening but she advised that she was in a “paranoid state” throughout the evening..


Julius Quinn Robert’s statement affidavit (doorman at the dime bar very closeby and witnessed any activity at front door)

I am the door guy at the dime which is no more than 16 feet away from where largo once was. I remember the day in question and remember nothing happen(ing) I even
talked to the ladies for a minute or two and invited them inside the dime for a drink. These ladies are good people to be around and everything that this woman said is a lie.



































Griffee testimony as to April 12th
MR. GRIFFEE:  LAST TIME THAT I SAW HER AT THECLUB WAS ON APRIL 12, SATURDAY NIGHT.THE COURT:  DID SHE SAY ANYTHING TO YOU?
MR. GRIFFEE:  YES, SIR.SHE SAID THINGS OVER THE ABOUT AN HOUR AND A HALF, SIR.  THERE WAS LOTS SAID --
THE COURT: 
WHAT ELSE DID SHE SAY TO YOU? MR. GRIFFEE:  BY THEN, THE OWNER WENT INSIDE AND I STAYED OUTSIDE.  HER SISTER WAS WITH HER OR THE PERSON I WAS TOLD WAS HER SISTER WAS WITH HER, AND THEY BASICLY JUST  BEGAN HARASSING ME SAYING THAT THEY WERE GOING TO CLOSE DOWN THE CLUB AND THAT THEY WERE VERY POWERFUL PEOPLE; THAT I WAS AN ASSHOLE, A FAGOT, AND BALD,
THE COURT: WHAT ELSE DID SHE SAY TO YOU?
MR. GRIFFEE: 
YOU KNOW, SHE BASICLY JUST KEPT REITERATING, YOU KNOW, "WHY DID KICK ME OUT LAST" -- IWAS, YOU KNOW, FIVE DAYS BEFORE THEN "WHY DID YOU KICK ME OUT ON MONDAY.  I WANT JUSTICE. I WANT JUSTICE." I KEPT SAYING, "I DON'T KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS.  THIS IS MY BUSINESS.  IF I SAY YOU SAY CAN’T BE HERE; YOU CAN'T BE HERE." THEY WALKED AWAY AFTER A COUPLE MINUTES,
AND THEN TEN MINUTES LATER SHE SHOWED UP AT THE BACK DOORAN ALLEY AND MY KITCHEN DOOR. 
THE COURT:  DID SHE SAY ANYTHING TO YOU BY THE BACK DOOR?MR. GRIFFEE:  YES.  THEY, MYSELF, AND KEVIN WERE OUT BACK.  KEVIN WAS HAVING A CIGAR IN THE ALLEY, AND I WENT BACK TO MAKE SURE THEY DIDN'T TRY TO COME IN THE BACK  DOOR.  BEFORE LONG THEY HAD BOTH COME UP THE ALLEY AN APPROACHED US AND WERE JUST VERBALLY HARASSIN I CAN TELL YOU THE GIST OF WHAT THEY WERE SAYI WAS JUST, YOU KNOW, STANDING FACE TO FACE WITH ME AND JUSTSAYING, YOU KNOW:  "YOU ARE AN ASSHOLE. YOU ARE A FUCKER.""YOU CAN'T KICK ME OUT OF YOUR CLUB."

"MY MOTHER IS A VERY POWERFUL PERSON."WE'RE GOING TO SHUT YOUR CLUB DOWN." IT WENT ON A VERY LONG TIME.
THE COURT:  DID THEY SAY ANYTHING ABOUT MS. NOTARO?
MR. GRIFFEE: 
WELL, THEY SAID, BASICALLY -- THE COURT:  STRIKE MY QUESTION.DID MS. SPITZBERG SAY ANYTHING ABOUT MS. NOTARO?
MR. GRIFFEE.  MS. SPITZBERG BASICLY WAS JUST SAYING, YOU KNOW:  "THAT BITCH CAN'T GET ME THROWN OUT OF YOUR CLUB AND, YOU KNOW:  "SHE HAS NO RIGHT TO TELL ME WHERE I CAN GO AND, YOU KNOW -- AND I JUST KEPT SAYING :  "WHY ARE YOU HERE?  I DON'T UNDERSTAND WHY ARE YOU HERE?  WHY DO IF YOU DON'T LIKE HER, WHY ARE YOU TRYING TO COME TO HER SHOW. WHY ARE YOU EVEN HERE." THE COURT:  AND SHE SAID? MR. GRIFFEE:  I NEVER GOT A LUCID ANSWER, YOUR HONOR.  SHE KEPT SAYING:  "I WANT JUSTICE.I WANT JUSTICE.  YOU CAN'T KICK ME OUT OF YOUR CLUB."
























SECCIAS Version of April 12th
I REMEMBER MS.NOTARO COMING UP TO ME BEFORE HER SHOW REALLY OUT OF THE SORTS, NERVOUS, UPSET TO THE POINT THAT I WAS NOT -- I WAS WORRIED ABOU KNOW, HER PERFORMANCE, THAT SHE'S GOOD TO GO ON STAGE.  SHE WAS REALLY FREAKED OUT, AND SHE EXPLAINED THE SITUATION,WHAT HAD HAPPENED AND WHAT HER CONCERNS WERE. ONE IS GOING TO COME IN HERE, NO ONE IS GOING TO -- MICHAEL WILL TAKE CARE OF IT.  NO ONE IS GOING TO STORM THROUGH THE DOOR, YOU KNOW.  I'M BACK HERE WATCHING THE DOOR.  YOU SHOULD BE ABLE TO GO ON STAGE. THE COURT:  DID YOU HAVE ANY CONVERSATIONS WITH MS. SPITZBERG?
MR. SECCIA: 
YES.
THE COURT:  TELL ME ABOUT THAT. 

SECCIA: THAT WAS LATER IN THE EVENING.  THAT WAS IN THE ALLEY WHEN I WAS SMOKING A CIGAR.  AND THEY ARE JUST REALLY AGGRESSIVE.
AND " "SHE IS A FUCKING CUNT," "WE'RE GOING TO GET HER,"THIS IS ISN'T OVER."
THEN SHE CALLED US NERDS, UGLY.  SHE ASKED WHAT WE WERE DOING.  I TRIED REASONING ALONG THE LINES:"DOESN'T THE BIGGER PERSON WALKAWAY.  WHO IS IN THE WRONG NOW THEN SHE WENT ON TO SAY -- I'M NOT SURE IF IT WAS   HER OR HER SISTER.  IT WAS MS. SPITZBERG WHO SAID THAT:
 "YOU KNOW, I DON'T HAVE A JOB .THE NEXT MONTH.  I'M OUT OF WORK.
   THIS IS MY JOB.  YOU TELL HER IT ISN'T OVER.  ANY TIME SHE GOES OUTTHE HOUSE, ANY TIME SHE PERFORMS,
I'M GOING TO BE ON HER.  I'M GOING   TO SHOW UP.  THIS IS NOW MY
JOB."



To Neil Spector PD

Seccia says he only knows Alisa from their one chance encounter on this occasion, and he further stated that he can’t even rememeber when this encounter had occurred, other than that it took place sometime last year. While located outside and to the rear or Largo, and in between performances, Seccia stated he had been smoking a cigarette when two female subjects approached him on foot.

Seccia said an employee of Largo , by the name of Micheal had actually been the person who was working at the rear of this club at the night in question. Seccia said he just happened to be smoking a cigarette outside and talking with Griffee when these two female subjects walked up to the two of them.

Seccia advised he later found out that these two female subjects had been Alisa and her sister(Lauren)Seccia did say that prior to this encounter with Alisa he had been informed about her another comedian friend of his by the name of “Tig”
Said he works with Notaro on occasion at clubs, be can’t remember whether she had been working with him at this location on this night in question.

When asked why Notaro had informed him and other possible employees at Largo of Alisa Seccia believed that she, meaning, Notaro, had been telling friends of hers, at the various clubs where she performed at , about Alisa and the fact that she, meaning Alisa, had supposedly been making some type of “threatening” remarks against her. Due to this, Notaro said he believed that Notaro was concerned for her safety, and she had wanted to make people aware of Alisa. Other that that information Seccia advised that he had never even heard of Alisa prior to this incident in question.
4. Did this really happen? It didn’t and Julius’s affidavit will confirm what really went on upfront and the profoundly conflicting statements of Notaro, Griffee and Seccia will show that it was a lie and that as Griffee said to the investigator: They just came to talk to management to find out why Notaro was kicking them out. Seccia says the incident took several minutes. Notaro states to this court that under penalty of perjury that this lasted an hour and a half.
5. So, this is the second incident? What about August and is this what happened. According to statements now in possession made my Notaro, Whitaker, Rita and that further discovery should show that Notaro has made this all up and has had others lie for her.
6.-13
The rest becomes moot and the order is void.


From Notaro’s police Statement.

On April 8th R received an e-mail from Spitzberg who expressed anger over being kicked out of the club and vowed revenge.

statement from Notaros affidavit.

The next day I received an e-mail from Alisa that read “ I will do everything in my sustainable power to get even with you.”

The actual e-mail I sent

Subject:
(no subject)
Date:
4/8/2008
From:


Reply To:


To:
tignation@hotmail.com
.
I had absolutely no beef with you. I just didn't. Why would I? But, for you to make up a false accusation of me pushing you  and have me kicked out when i asked you if I'd heard right about that is incomprehensible. Me and my sister were told to check out the walsh brothers and she didn't want to go so I decided to see what turned out to be your show. You were excellent, and the show was great and that's that. Why would you want to lie about and hurt someone in your audience?  I never deserved or anticipated that you'd make up some lie and then have me thrown out. What a hateful thing to do to someone who just pays you a compliment  and who has nothing to do with you except for some bad fling ,over a year ago,  with your then ex girlfriend. I'll do everything in my(substantial) power to get even.

Affidavit of Notaro

for the duration of this time period, after every incident in which Alisa attempted to contact me in person( I thought I was there to contact Stephanie?) she harassed Stephanie Willen with repeated phone calls and e-mails.

NOTE from Spitzberg: Show one call. I never called Willen ONCE. E-mails were meant to get some understanding of Notaro’s behavior. When did Willen change her number? If so, why? Have them show calls or e-mails etc.

In police report Notaro or Willen says I called Willen and tried to contact her employers. Bring these “employers,” To court. Have willen testify or anyone she knows and was around her during that period.





Police report – April 29th 2008- statement by notaro

On April 28th 2008, Notaro performed at the Improv. A friend had contacted her prior to the arrival at the club and told her that Spitzberg had been removed by security.

At 2130 hours Notaro finished her act and was leaving the club. Notaro was outside with a friend when she saw Lauren spitzberg walking towards her. Notaro went back inside the club and watched from a window. Spitzberg, her sister, and mother were all outside the club yelling about Spitzberg being removed from the club. Spitzberg stated that R better watch her back and that she knew where she lived what car she drove. Patrol officers were called and arrived at the scene.

















Affidavit of Notaro- April 29th 2008



On the night of Tuesday 29th 2008 I performed at the Improv in Hollywood.CA. As I was driving to the club, Lesley Wolff, the promoter for the show called me to inform me that Alisa had been inside the club and had been removed. As I pulled up at 8.PM, I saw Alisa Outside talking to People. I noticed a sherriff the street, unrelated to the situation, and asked him to see what was going on., to distract alisa, so I could go through the side door.

Brian, the door security informed me that Alisa had announced to him my license plate number and color/make of car, and warned that she knew where I lived.
At 9:30 p.m I was informed that Alisa had left, and then I attempted to leave the club. Just as I took a step out of the door I saw Lauren Walking towards the venue.. Feeling unsafe I went back inside. I was informed that Alisa, Lauren, and their mother were now all in the front of the club. I was stuck inside the club for two more hours as the three of them verbally attacked performers, patrons, and security. The police were called and made note of the incident but because my life had not been directly threatened they were unable to take action. Eventually, the three women left and I was able to go home






Trancript testimony of Notaro. April 29,2008
I WAS PERFORMING AT THE IMPROV IN HOLLYWOOD, AND I SHOWED UP –AND I HAVE INFORMED THE CLUBS WHERE I PERFORM ABOUT ALISA AND HER SISTER BECAUSE THEY HAVE SHOWN UP PREVIOUSLY TO OTHER VENUES WHERE I HAVE PERFORMED, AND SO THEY KNEW ABOUT THEM.  SO WHEN I WAS ARRIVING TO THE CLUB, THEY CALLED ME TO TELL ME -- THE CLUB CALLED TO TELL ME THAT ALISA WAS THERE AND SHE HAD BEEN REMOVED FROM THE CLUB  SO I SHOWED UP AT THE SHOW; ALISA, HER SISTER, AND THEN HER MOTHER, ALSO SHOWED UP WHILE I WAS PERFORMING AND SPENT TWO HOURS CASING THE PLACE AND MAKING THREATS AND HARRASSING
THE COURT:  WHO DID THEY MAKE THREATS TO?
MS. NOTARO:  PEOPLE WAITING TO GO TO THE SHOW. 
THE COURT: YOU WERE INSIDE PERFORMING?
MS. NOTARO:  YES.
THE COURT:  YOU ARE TELLING ME THEY ARE OUTSIDE -- THE PEOPLE THAT, I ASSUME, ARE STANDING IN LINETO GET IN -- AND THAT THEY ARE GOING UP TO THESE PEOPLE TO DISCOURAGE THEM FROM SEEING YOU. IS THAT WHAT YOU ARE SAYING?
MS. NOTARO:  NO.  THEY WERE SAYING TOTHESECURITYGUARD
THE COURT:  YES.
  MS. NOTARO:  -- AT THE DOOR, THAT I BETTER WATCHMY BACK, ALL BASED ON OTHER PREVIOUS EVENTS.  THAT'S WH CAN'T -- DIDN'T COME OUT OF THE VENUE.
THE COURT:  THEY ARE TELLING THIS TO THE SECURITY PEOPLE?
MS. NOTARO:  RIGHT, WHO ARE HERE.  I'VE BROUGHT THEM HERE.
THE COURT:  SHE IS ALLEGEDLY SAYING IT TO THIS PERSON BUT NOT TO YOU?
MS. NOTARO:  RIGHT. THE COURT:  OKAY.  I MEAN, WHILE YOU ARE INSIDE AND YOU ARE DOING YOUR SHOWS. NOTARO: I COULDN'T LEAVE BECAUSE THEY WERE OUT THERE.  BASED ON PREVIOUS SITUATIONS, I DIDN'T WANT TO COME OUT OF THE CLUB  BECAUSE THEY HAD BEEN AGGRESSIVE AT OTHER VENUES



.








BRIAN WHITAKERS TESTIMONY as to April 29,2008

THE COURT:  OKAY.  WHAT DO YOU FOR THE CLUB? MR. WHITAKER:  I'M SECURITY THERE, SIR.
THE COURT:  WHICH CLUB.
MR. WHITAKER:  THE IMPROV COMEDY CLUB.
THE COURT:  DID YOU SEE MS. SPITZBERG AT THE CLUB?
MR. WHITAKER:  YES.
 
THE COURT:  WHAT DID SHE SAY TO YOU?
MR. WHITAKER:  WELL, IT WAS OVER A COURSE,   BELIEVE, OF -- IT'S MORE LIKE TIG WAS THIS WHOLE TIME -- SHE MENTIONED TWO HOURS; IT WAS ACTUALLY MORE LIKE FOUR OR FIVE HOURS.  DURING THE ENTIRE NIGHT, SHE SHOWED UP A LEFT AND THEN HAD HER SISTER SHOW UP AND SHE LEFT; THEN THEY ALL THREE CAME BACK; SHE, HER MOTHER -- FIRST, THERE  WERE A LOT OF WORDS EXCHANGED, BUT IT STARTED OFF, I SHE CAME OUT FOR A CIGARETTE AND -- I NOTICED HER FROM THE PICTURE I WAS GIVEN AND WARNED OF,  SO I -- YOU KNOW, WE HAD BEEN TALKING FOR A LITTLE BIT,   HAVING A POLITE CONVERSATION.  SHE SEEMED A LITTLE BIT OFF. I CHECKED THE PICTURE BECAUSE THE EYES LOOKED FAMILIAR TO MY PICTURE IN MY POCKET, SHIRT POCKET. I NOTICED IT WAS HER.  I ASKED HER IF HER NAMEWAS ALISA.  SHE SAID:  "HOW DO YOU KNOW?"I SAID, "I'M VERY SORRY YOU CAME. CAN'T ALLOW YOU BACK IN THE CLUB SHE IMMEDIATELY JUST SEEMED TO KNOW WHAT I WAS  TALKING ABOUT.  HER EYES LIT UP."DID THAT DIKE HAVE ME KICKED OUT OF HERE? I SAID -- I WAS TRYING TO PLAY HER FRIEND  I SAID:  "YOU KNOW WHAT THEY SAY ABOUT COMICS, THEY CAN BE PREMADONNAS." I WAS TRYING TO KEEP HER OUT IN A PEACEFUL WAY THEY WANTED MONEY BACK FOR THE BEER THEY BOUGHT.  I TRIEDTO ARRANGED WITH THE BARTENDER TO GET HER A LITTLE MONEY BACK.  AND WHEN I GOT HER MONEY BACK FOR THEM, THEY WENTHER TIP BACK, AND THE BARTENDER WOULD NOT GIVE THE TIP BACK. SHE STARTED TO GET A LITTLE BIT AGITATED AND I ASKED HER TO STAND A LITTLE BIT FURTHER AWAY FROM THE DOO WHICH THEY DID, SHE DID.  AND IT WAS STILL -- IT WAS STIL ON A CORDIAL LEVEL.  WE WERE TRYING TO KEEP IT PEACEFULL ALL THAT.  IT WAS WORKING THEN SHE STARTED BEING -- SHE STARTED TRYING TO BE SUBTLE IN HER INSULTS TOWARDS ME "I UNDERSTAND YOUR POSITION YOU ARE TRYING TO PROTECT YOUR SHITTY I SAID, "YEAH, YOU KNOW HOW IT IS. SHE BASICLY INFORMED ME THEN, SHE SAID:"DON'T WORRY, I KNOW TIG'S CAR. I KNOW THE LICENSE PLATSHE MENTIONED THE MAKE AND LICENSE PLATE ON THECAR.  I ONLY REMEMBER TWO NUMBERS IN THE LICENSE PLATE THATSHE MENTIONED.  I CLEARED IT WITH TIG LATER AND ASKED W I MET TIG IS THAT HER CAR, IS THAT THE MAKE. SHE SAID, "HOW DID SHE KNOW THIS?" BASICALLY, AFTER THAT, I TOLD HER:YOU ARE NOT GOING -- YOU HAVE TNOT WELCOME HERE." SHE STARTED CALLING ME A DOG.  SHE SAID I WASTRYING TO MAKE INSTANT MANAGER.  SHE ASKED AROUND INSIDE. SHE FOUND OUT I ONLY MAKE $4.00 AN HOUR THERE.  I'M JU THERE TO KISS UP AND, YOU KNOW, TRY TO BE A COMEDIAN WHATEVER.  THEN SHE SWITCHED HER STORY.  FIVE MINUTES LATER SHE GOT AROUND INSIDE AND FOUND OUT THAT I DON'T GET PAID AT ALL TO BE THERE.

Reeta Piazza- gives statement to investigator- contradicts all statements yet and makes no sense and is only in response to fear of lawsuit. Nothing she says is accurate and everything she says just contradicts all testimony of notaro or Whitaker.


Reeta Piazza statement.
On an unknown date and sometime last year piazza said that spitzberg had showed up at the improv on an evening in which notaro was going to be performing there. Piazza further said tNotaro was concerned that spitzberg may try and disrupt her show if she was allowed in this venue on the evening of her performance.

On this particular night in question Reeta state that one of their comedians by the name of Brian whitaker, who was also working in the capacity as “security” at the front door, was the one who had initially recognized Spitzberg at the front door. Whitaker said that Spitzberg had earlier been trying to into the show that night but since Whitaker had recognized her from the earlier photograph, he was not allowing her into this location.

Reeta stated this situation was now brought to her attention that evening, due to Spitzbergs’ supposed behavior after she was denied access into the comedy club. Reeta was advised that spitzberg was acting in a very aggressive manner towards her staff (who???) after she had been denied access into the club. When asked what she meant by “aggressive.” Reeta said that Spitzberg was being “verbally abusive” towards her employees, especially towards Brian Whitaker.

Reeta stated the she then went outside and briefly spoke to Spitzberg about this situation. She said that when she talked to Spitzberg, it appeared that Spitzberg's eyes were very “wild” and she had a strange look about herself. She said Spitzberg also told her that she is a lawyer and that she wasn’t going to look into taking some legal action against her and the club for not allowing her inside the club on that particular evening. Reeta stated after having a brief conversation with her, who believed that Spitzberg is definitely a “disturbed’ individual. When asked if she knew whether or not, if Spitzberg had been alone on that night in question reeta said she believed so, since nobody else had made contact with her, other than spitzberg herself.

She said she works as the Director of Special Events at the Improv Comedy Showcase and Restaurant. She stated that she knows Notaro well, due to the fact she performs at her club as a comedian, on a regular basis. She said she has also met spitzberg on a couple of different occasions due to the fact that she has shown up as a customer at this location when Notaro has performed there. Other than those circumstances she would have absolutely no idea who Spitzberg is.

On a different occasion Reeta stated that Spitzberg once again showed p to the Improv but this time she had identified herself as Spitzberg’s sister Reeta said she was unable to remember about this incident, whether or not the two of them had just wanted to enter the premises in order to watch a show on that particular evening or if they had just come together as to talk with club management in order to try and find out why Spitzberg had been denied access to this business on a previous night.

Reeta said that both Spitzberg and her sister were again verbally abusing her employees on that particular night, and once again neither of them were let into the show on that evening. When asked if Notaro had been performing there on that night, reeta said she wasn’t sure. Reeta advised that the two of them had actually refused to leave on that night, and they were about to call the police. Reeta said both her and her sister eventually left the premises.

Sometime in May 2008, reeta stated that Spitzberg’s mother had also showed up to their comedy club On that particular date, reeta advised the that her mother had some kind of transcripts in her possession, and apparently wanted to show her what had been said about her daughter, that being Spitzberg, at a court hearing involving Notaro obtaining a restraining order against her daughter. R further stated that spitzbergs mother had told her some of her employees had supposedly lied at this restraining order hearing pertaining to issues involving both Notaro and her daughter. R said she never looked at these “transcripts” that spitzbergs mother had in her possession.

In addition Reeta stated that Spitzberg once again showed up at her club, and she was telling her, meaning relaying to r how “Unproffessional” her staff was. R said she didn’t have to call the police this last time when Spitzberg had showed up at this club.

Reeta did advise on the one night that Spitzberg had had showed up to the Improv, in which Notaro had been performing on that particular evening, Notaro did seem very ‘frightened” as soon as she found out that Spitzberg was in front of the club. And she was attempting to get in so as to attend Notaro’s performance. Reeta said neither notaro nor spitzberg had contact with one another on that night in question.

R also stated that Notaro had asked her to show up to court on the date of her restraining order violation hearing but she was out of town on that same date.
R further advised that she doesn’t want to be involved in this matter any longer. I then ended my conversation with r and conducted no further investigation.


July 14, 2008



Notaro
My friend and fellow comedian, Martha Kelly, informed me of being singled out and harassed by Alisa Spitzberg regarding the permanent restraining order I was awarded against Ms. Spitzberg on May 28th, 2008. Martha described being at a venue “El Cid” in Los Feliz CA to do Stand up comedy and Ms approaching her and saying such things as “Tell tig I said to drop the restraiing order, she’s a pathological liar, my mother can’t sleep at night because of this, I can’t buy a firearm now, I don’t see her as a human being and I will never let her rest for as long as she’s alive.

Comedian Jeff Singer also witnessed this interaction and contacted me about the scene Ms Spitzberg was causing at the show. Mr Spitzberg’s behavior and comments were extremely disturbing and offered to be a witness if necessary.

Thanks in advance for your attention to this matter,
Mathilde(Tig) Notaro

Ms.
Martha- no mention of mother, no mention of converstation, no mention of me not introducing myself in any way.






Notaro- singeld out Kelly, made scene, mentioned mother couldn’t sleep, made scene of note

Jeff Singer or Klinger- anxious to discuss the disturbing scene- another aspiring comedian ala seccia and Whitaker who have now been shown to be lying.





Manager of el Cid. “No idea what spector was talking about. Would now of any incidence of importance. Never heard or any of this.




Further evidence. Tom sharpe doesn’t live with her and never did. Also goes to show how widespread the slander is/will be in the future.

In response to “Hogre” saying “great article about your roommate on citybeat LA website. Mr. Sharpe writes flattering piece about notaro. Someone writes “ great article about your roommate.

There is an insinuation in your comment. Allow me to clarify:
Tig and I have performed in several shows together and I consider her a friend. While we've exchanged the occasional email and phone call, I haven't seen her in person in over 10 months. We have never been roommates. There was some talk a number of months ago about a group of comics renting a house together-- I was one of those comics. While Tig and a couple of other comics did move forward with that plan, I've never even set foot in the place. Curious to know how you could possibly have heard about any of this, or where you got your erroneous information that I was currently her roommate.
Here's who I am:
I'm a standup comic who's been at it for well over a decade-- this past year and a half I've been inactive due to illness. I know and am on friendly terms with probably half of the comedians in Los Angeles. No exaggeration. Hundreds and hundreds of them. I love comics, from big shot headliners to first year open mikers. You can't do comedy in LA for as long as I have without becoming friends with your fellow comics. (Not unless you're antisocial. Which I'm not, Erin, even though I was a bedwetter and one of the best.) When the editor asked me about writing about comedy for citybeat from time to time I expressed concern. I could write about some brilliant comics, but many of them might also happen to be my friends. It was unavoidable. That's the circle that I run in. Was that a problem?
She thought I could work it out. Here's my promise: If I write about a comic, they're going to be relevant and excellent at their craft. If there's a relevant relationship, I will disclose it.
posted by tomsharpe on 10/10/08 @ 12:34 a.m.

Hogre,
Your comments and my initial response may have been inadvertently removed along with some targeted comments, which were removed due to their similarity to a glut of comments left on Tig's videos and website and in emails over the past year by a stalker. This person has been court ordered to refrain from all contact with Tig. This is a painful situation and it's truly unfortunate it has to come up here-- I hope that you find it in your heart to understand the circumstances under which you now feel slighted. And I hope that you will refrain from reposting those inappropriate comments as you did above, without waiting for a response.
Again, I am not Tig's roomate. But, I would call her a friend. I have not spoken to her face to face in over 10 months, although we have communicated occasionally by phone and email. As you can see in the interview, I indicated in the question regarding the crackpot tour that I have collaborated with Tig in the past. I was contacted by Tig a number of months ago when she learned that I might have been looking for a place. She and two other comics were concurrently looking for a 4th roommate in a houseful of comedians. I did not move in with them.

As a standup comedian active in the Los Angeles scene for well over a decade, I am on friendly terms with hundreds of comedians. I hope that the concern you've voiced really does regard journalistic integrity as opposed to a personal vendetta and that this will answer your question. My relationships with comedians-- and many of the comics who are most newsworthy in Los Angeles are also my friends-- will have it's pros and cons when I write about comedy. I've learned so much about the inner workings of comedy due to my experience working alongside these comics, interacting with them professionally and socially, and I think this experience qualifies me as an expert as to who is at the top of their comedy game, advancing the craft of standup and making a difference in the Los Angeles and national scene. But I acknowledge it is possible that my friendships might color some objectivity. I keep this in mind and I look to radio for a parallel: I feel that if Steve Jones can do a consistently good radio show, maybe I can somehow pull off an occasional article about comedy. My motivation is this: introduce the Los Angeles public to some truly excellent comedy in the city, and in the process, get paid a few dollars to do it.
I hope this answers your questions
posted by tomsharpe on 10/10/08 @ 09:13 p.m.


















Motive for spitzberg? As invented by Notaro or Willen or both? Spitzberg was jealous over weekend spent with notoaro in april 07 and also upset that Willen didn’t help Spitzberg with comedy career via Notaro.
Destroyed by emails and other evidence. Show e-mails. Send relevant e-mails file.

Motive for Notaro( pig poem. Val Myers “ What are you entitled?” E-mails where willen tells Spitzberg knitting needles over tig due to her and Willen telling Spitzberg how Spitzberg was educated, read, had a good family, so much better than notaro- probably told this to tig to get her jealous and this time willen’s attempt to get someone jealous did work)

Tom sharpe doesn’t live with her
Neither does Chris Fairbanks.

Garage comedy-
Targeted Kelly according to Notaro. Show evidence of going there to avoid any chance of seeing notaro etc. Lack of logic to any of it and depose Kelly or get written statement.
What was really said and was there a scene.

Show investigator’s report of el cid manager.

Credit card statements.
Notoro’s run ins with threats and violence

In a message dated 4/21/2007 2:28:35 PM Pacific Daylight Time,
> swillen@gmail.com writes to alisa spitzberg:
> alisa,
> back now at my place. had a crazy night. went to the normadie room
> with tig and her friend from denver. we wanted to show her friend a
> nice, quiet bar and at the end of the evening a birthday girl calledd tig a "fucking dyke" for eating a
> piece of her cake, then the girl threw cake at her, and yelled at me,
> then the next thing we knew she was thowing beer mugs at
> people's foreheads and three girls walked out bleeding from the head,
> two abulences came and she started unching some other girl
> up against the glass, then she actually dove out the glass,
> shattering it, cutting herself and ran down the street. a fire truck
> then came and we were all asked to help the police find a girl running
> down santa monica. i told an officer, "shes wearing an a tshirit > shirt and she's bleeding. good luck."

From an interview she (notaro) just did- check to see if this really happened
My joke is- well, then just call the doll Becky. Some people got up during the set and walked out. I asked them, ‘Where are you headed?’ and they said ‘Maybe you’ll think twice before you make fun of people.’ One of the woman pointed at somebody she was with and was like, ‘He just got over cancer...’ I was so baffled, so confused. Everybody was baffled! I don’t know where they read in that I was saying, ‘Haha you have cancer.’ Nowhere. I don’t know where it came about. So, they left and started yelling with the owner of the bar, it turned into a brawl and the cops came. I was still on stage this whole time. A fist fight broke out... This is all during my set. I had to stay focused and talk to audience while people were pinning each other down and screaming. And one of the guys that left, the police broke his leg while they were holding him down.”
from martha kelly's blog

 Portland threw us a curveball which we caught and re-threw into a jewelry store, breaking the window and setting off the alarm system. When the cops came we pleaded not guilty by reason of Steve's beard, and as per usual they let us walk.
 I tried to rush Tig and Steve out right after the Super 7 show. Tig's response to being rushed goes something like "Oh, uh-uh, no. I won't be talked to like that" and then she walks away. I got mad at her and we had our first and so far only fight while Steve obliviously fingered Japanese toys at the back of the store. I thought we might not speak to each other for hours but our fight ended as abruptly as it started when Tig sassed a panhandler outside the store. She countered his long and winding road of a story with "Hold on a minute sir, I've got a story for YOU." Then she told him about her dad the security guard who lives in a basement in Baltimore. Tour Number Two, Update Number One
Dear Crackpot Blog,
First stop: Ontario, CA. We left an hour late due to a combination of me being an hour late and no one having the balls to leave without me. To make up on time, Tig almost rear-ended a guy. I screamed, Tig objected, Steve overruled the objection. Sidetrack: on the first tour, people not liking other people's driving was a big issue. The people who didn't like my driving were against hearing "whoa-oh!" every time we took a corner over 30 mph. The people who didn't like Tig's driving were disturbed by her combination of speeding and saying things like "I'm not afraid of dying" and "Nothing really matters anyway."



from some other invertiew
Tig Well, we almost got our asses kicked last night. We stayed at this guy’s house who literally went crazy while we were staying there and almost murdered us, so it’s not really as fun as it sounds.
Martha I didn’t stay there. That’s probably why I think it’s fun.
Tig Yeah.

Poems to tig on Willen blog. Evidence available to show that these “poems are written by willen and are to Mathilde.

Aug 4 2008 8:21 PM

do you know you are in kjell's top friends? things are really looking up for you! congrats on that AND the new horse.

May 29 2008 4:05 PM

80 degrees, sunny, mariposa st., sushi dinner, swim in the hot springs tomorrow on our drive up to aspen, comedy festival dinner party friday night, hike saturday morning in the mountains, tell jokes for 15 minutes saturday night and make monthly income for june, take sunday off to hang out in aspen with friends, fly home to LA to shoot 2 more episodes. thankfully a couple of vacations are coming up after this hectic schedule.

On willen’s my space one right after she lied for her in the restraining order.(may 29)Benefited from false testimony- getting big gigs after doing nothing but open mics. No youtube views. Obvious.
Nov 2 2008 5:03 AM

great workin' with ya tig - thanks again, nice riff with "sparkles


Her blogs etc.- admissions of false allegations, memory problems, morality problems ect.
False Allegations.
in unrelated news, my plan to start a band fell apart. turns out our lead guitarist was on smack. i'm not even really sure what "smack" is exactly, but i know that she was on it because people said things like, "i literally think she's on smack." i still hear from our night ranger-style singer/drummer laura silverman daily accusing me of firing her and demanding to be back in the band.

.. git!martha and i worked really hard on the crackpot tour. this means that basically she was in a constant state of panic but signed all of her emails to me with "can't wait. this is gonna be great." lied until it was true

its just a rumor, so you best start gettin excited. a few years back, i stopped cycling. not intentionally, it just happened. maybe you never even knew i cycled at all. if that's the case, then boy do you have some catching up to do. anyway, i would do local rides and long distance rides. other countries, state to state, down to the beach and back or just to the store to buy a new purse or a fun shade of lipstick. i have been missing cycling so much. there is a great deal of focus in cycling. every monday and friday morning, before my friend stef goes to work (around the corner from my house), we take walks around town or down by the ocean together and discuss all things. i'd say they are interesting conversations, but i can't help but dread the thought of ever having to read a transcript of our talks.

was about me going back to my hometown in mississippi after the hurricane and living w/my family in the destruction, with day to day old family issues causing flashbacks from my past

i'll see what i can remember. i have a horrible memory and tend to get easily distracted. it's not always the best thing to take walks down memory lane w/me. it's not horrible, it's just not always great. chances are, you don't even look remotely familiar to me and your name does not ring any name bells. this includes immediate family members too. here we go w/memory lane 2 or so weeks back. my friend tommy came into town and stayed with me for several days.

Morality problems

it's a lovely time, really. the dvd "operation googsie" will be for sale one day w/all money going to charity OR right up my nose. i haven't decided yet..... in other hurricane news, a little over a year ago, hbo had approached me to pitch/develop a show with them. the show i worked on
.kyle was telling me last night that they are as lucky to have me as i am to have them. he's a

Kyles a nice friend. you need people around you that are THAT comfortable with lying right to your face

Manipulates Martha- last on list and only “likes her.” Etc.
it was written by my good friends tom sharpe (i love you tom) and martha kelly (i like you martha).

you'll also see chris fairbanks, scott aukerman, bj porter, ruby wendell, joe wagner, martha

Prone exaggeration and no regard for truth

kyle and i are still writing like crazy. crazy being like 2 or 3 times a week. it usually takes us a good 2 hours before we start actually writing because we like to gossip about ourselves to one another and then we usually eat a nice healthy raw meal. this makes me happy and it makes him complain about starving and then he usually heats up a pizza at 3am and complains about eating a pizza at 3am and how i should have stopped him. we have about 10 sketches/shorts we are hoping to get filmed in the months to come. "months to come" could mean whatever you want it to. i want it to mean "soon." i'm leaving for new york in a couple of days. i'm really excited about hanging out w/my nyc folk. i have very little time and it will no doubt be spent w/kevin williams, dave hill and nick kroll. it's hard going to different cities all the time because i know so many people. memory lane-type stuff comes up. i'm not always good at it knew that

From interview- intimidating martha
Tape wheezy swish youtube.= show notaro’s demeanor





























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